(I think I was originally going to do more. like, I probably had an idea for where this was going. but now its 00:00 and I'm sleepy and just want to play some fucking video games so, I'm done, sorry if this is shit lmao)

Athens | M: i don;t know I can;t think I'nn tired

Don't overthink it. Athens told himself silently, tinged with unease as his eyes were drawn to stare down at himself. For likely the first time ever, he seemed somewhat prettied up, white collared butten up tucked loosely into black dress pants, matching black jacket draped over his arm. It felt more than just strange, wearing something so neat and ornately made, of which he definitely couldn't have gotten on his own, but yet was so simple to the eye. He could hardly understand why everyone considered these kinds of get-ups classy, though he couldn't deny that it made him feel different, so to speak.

But in that regard, it was an unnerving "different". Perhaps the sense of dizziness he felt from the situation came from the feeling of being undeserving, unworthy. The sheer thought of appearing pampered was even a bit painful, as he knew he had always been far off from well cared for, and he had no right fitting in with the well off folk. He had no right to express a lie.

In spite of his feelings toward it all, the reasons he was in this position were a heavy reminder to buck up, whether it'd be easy or not. A stay at White Oaks had been a saving grace for him and the boy he had pretty much, more or less, adopted as his own, and supporting the centre at a gathering was the least he could do to repay them. Along with that, he would have never been able to show his face in such a gussied setting if it hadn't been for Dash's kindness and persistence. Although he hated to take from others, for one reason or the other, he had fallen into line with Dash's gift, and the least he could do for him was put it to use. That man may have intended it as an act of thanks, but Athens surely couldn't live on without repaying once more. He'd be sure to do that whatever way he could, even if it was simple and didn't feel like enough.

"Hen!" Judea's naturally babyish voice shouted the nickname plainly, pulling the blonde from his drowning thoughts. Blinking into a look of fake calmness, he focused his attention on the fidgety boy in front of him. The teen had a rather similar get-up -- white shirt, black others -- though he actually wore his jacket, open and lightly blown by a breeze. Somehow, despite being tidy, he managed to look like a loose party animal, which was clearly amplified by his hyperactive personality. "It's gonna be boring and long, so let's just get this over with!"

After a momentary pause, Athens shrugged lightly in a "can't argue" fashion. Judea then took the older youngster by the arm and whipped around, marching onward into the gala scene in a half-run, dragging his friend along. Athens didn't do anything for a moment, more than just used to the treatment, but as they came through the entrance he became more aware and applied the brakes, forcing his partner to stop and look back at him.

The kid was ready to run rampant -- that much was clear -- and it was imperative to shut that down before anything bad happened. "Bud.. I know it's not easy, but you're really going to have to try and tone it down for a while.." Athens hesitantly began quietly, his voice soft as if trying to avoid conflict. Surely the infamous Little Dee craziness was unwanted here. Although he was going to say more to expand on the words he regrettably didn't string together well, he was cut short. "Don't worry! Havoc, paused." Judea assured with a wink and a thumbs up. Athens offered a weak smile, but before he could respond something caught the teen's attention and he was already scurrying off into the ocean of people.

Sighing quietly, the blonde stared for a few seconds, temporarily letting down his calm facade. If he thought thinking about this environment was rough enough, being in it was a whole new story. He could say for sure that he had never come anywhere close to such a gathering before, and the unfamiliarity was slightly nauseating. Come on... This is nothing. He tried to use his normal, more confident tone as he spoke to himself in his mind, hoping he could work some magic and get rid of the thoughts.

Not wanting to stay in the way of the doorway, Athens rebuilt a fake but convincing confident appearance and drifted away, entire focus as he walked going into the conscious effort of releasing tension and clearing his mind. He eased into more rythmic breaths, imagined spiritually warmer places. He faked it for just long enough that it all became reality and he didn't have to try anymore. Finally, he was his usual self.

By this point, he had settled himself standing just far enough from surrounding people to not look like he was snooping on conversations. Since he was no longer occupied by negative thoughts, he naturally switched to the usual analytical gazing, green-brown gaze falling on every visible spec of the busy area as if every little thing gave more important knowledge. After a bit, nothing had stood out to him and, satisfied with what he had gathered, he began to drift around again, eyes sweeping the scene for something to catch.

Erin | M: Open

Delicate, muffled sounds of gala life traveled faintly through the stillness of the yard, accompanied by a crisp, emotional breeze. The growing darkness was a comfort, all the while eery with the sky's fading. Although the land was generally quite peaceful and welcoming, the spirit of lonesomeness plagued the forest's edge, itself attached to the motionless boy sat beneath a powerful oak.

He gazed at the black horizon blankly, arms hugging his knees against his chest. Despite the tension he felt, he couldn't bring himself to have more than one thought every so often, and that left his issues unresolved, regardless of how heavy they tore down at him. Only one thing did he gather the power to decide; he could not show his face at that gala.

Maybe it was pain, maybe it was jealousy. Maybe, deep down, it was really just anxiety. Or, more likely, it was a suffocating mixture of all that, plus much more.

He was alone. No matter how hard he tried to bury that fact, it remained true and wounding. Disowned by his family, separated from his best friend by a country border. He knew not one person well for an inconceivable amount of miles, and though he had gone on pretending it didn't matter, the sight of so many people so together demolished his facade. Everyone in that room had someone. Then there was him, broken and alone, unable to mutter even a small introduction to cure himself of his lonesome. Not. Even. A word.

His inability to just get rid of the feelings, get rid of the problems, get rid of the smothering loneliness.. It brought his greatest battle, the emptiness of being useless. Not deserving any goodness because he couldn't work its pay. Simply not being able to accept goodness, closed shut by his own critcal insults -- which only made him feel more worthless, as he couldn't even do that simplest thing. Over and over, he found himself achingly muttering, "What's wrong with me, what's wrong with me, why can't I just act normal?"

It seemed so simple, yet so far from reachable. The answers were clear, but he couldn't use them.

Strangely enough, being away from the people and the action was the only thing keeping him from breaking down. He couldn't bear to see everyone smiling, dancing, enjoying each others' presence -- simply doing everything that he found himself far from able to achieve. Doing the simple, the easy. Showing him just how stupid he was for not doing it all with them. It was a tease. "See how alone you are? How incompetent?"

But even so, hovering in the not-so-hidden outdoors was a humiliating guilt trip. In his mind, he was disappointing Kholo by not obeying her simple request to represent the centre at the gala. Ignoring that ask made him ungrateful for his situation at the centre, did it not? But then, how could he represent the place well? He was a bucket of emotional garbage. If he showed the guests anything, it'd be pure cons. So maybe it was better that he disappoint her, just to save her and the property's reputation.

Exhausted by his sentiment, he dropped his gaze downward with a sigh, trying to silence himself. His large black hoodie, though warming, failed to stifle a shiver from crawling through him, though he still refused to move. Doing anything would be too draining. Besides, he deserved the cold. He deserved painful chill as punishment for his untamed emotion.

(Ughhh this post is icky. has no flow >.> *cries*)

Athens | M: Dash

A quick sparkle lit his eyes as he caught sight of Dash, dapper and confident. Gazing at him felt more than just the usual pursuit of knowledge, and looking away was more difficult than expected, though Athens could hardly recognize his reasons. He attempted to ignore the urge to glance back, but he soon gave in, looking over to be greeted by the man's rousing approach. Shifting slightly in place, the blonde smiled and blinked at him in a welcoming manner, silently showing acceptance of soon-to-be interaction.

As Dash spoke to Judea, Athens flicked his gaze down, pausing before directing his attention to the jacket he held in the corner of his arm. It was meant to be worn now, but he couldn't bring himself to do so. He enjoyed the freedom outside of the tighter fit, and so he continued to refuse the coat, despite the fact that it had become an unneeded carry on. No matter, it didn't bother him. Just to get it out of the way, he slung it over his shoulder, and it managed to look as if that had always been its intended placement. Satisfied, he looked back up to Dash, now entranced by being spoken to.

The look he received from the man gave him a warm, fuzzy sensation all throughout, and he had to work to not be distracted by it. Taking a longer blink, he softly gave a quick, audible exhale of, perhaps, amused disbelief in response to Dash's words, a fair smile making its way to his expression. "As are you." Athens soon replied, voice on the quieter side, though surely not void of meaning.

From Dash's presence came a confident energy, and he couldn't help but be intrigued. Though he didn't share the same surefooted stance, Athens could feed off of the positive air, easily warmed by it and readied for the remaining time.

The next interaction brought back that fuzzy feeling, and for a moment he was too tranced to do anything but follow blindly. Though when he soon regained himself, he still found no need to do anything but. "Well, if a fossil 'll entertain you." Athens kidded with a faint, silly smirk.