Sage could feel himself tensing up more and more the closer they got to Lizzie, and Anya could probably tell too, the way he was pressing up against her. He swallowed the lump in his throat when he first saw the grave, his breath hitching slightly as he lost concentration of controlling his breathing for a moment. Man, what was he thinking coming here? He was dimly aware of Anya leaving...he didn't acknowledge it at all, he was just standing there with shaking breaths and staring at the spot where Lizzie was laying. He could feel his hands shaking too...something that hadn't happened in a long time. He could feel tears pressing at the back of his eyes but he swallowed and blinked hard, chasing them away. He hadn't cried in years, and he wasn't going to now. He couldn't. If he let himself crack, it would all come out, and he wasn't sure if he could break and then put himself back together again. Maybe letting himself cry would be smart, but he just wasn't willing to let that happen. Instead, he clenched his shaking hands into fists and straightened his spine, clenching his jaw. He was more used to this...being hard, defending himself. Shutting everything out and cracking a joke, forcefully making things nit as bad as they really were. He couldn't act perfectly fine...Anya would know better, but he couldn't let himself go. His emotions terrified him, and he wanted to be able to patch himself up like he always did and keep trudging on no matter what happened.

Anya set everything up relatively quickly before looking back to Sage with a slight smile, though it quickly disappeared when she looked him over. "Sage," she breathed out, trying to get his attention so that he wouldn't focus on the looming sadness and guilt that would surely be hovering over him. She did think for a moment about going over to him and guiding him to the little blanket, but she was for whatever reason a bit... nervous about going near him. She wasn't scared of him she never had been, but she was a little cautious that if she'd caught him off guard then he wouldn't be able to control how he'd react to her. She picked up a small cupcake from the basket and held it up. "You like cake?" she questioned quietly, just trying to get him talking... maybe he was talking about something else, but he wouldn't lose it... he just needed to get his mind on something else rather than just stressing himself out about Lizzie... he needed to get upset about it, he did, but she'd much rather have him sitting down than being up and hurting himself before she could get to him.

Sage heard Anyas voice, though it only got to him once he realized she'd asked him a question. He needed to answer, but in all honesty he hadn't really been listening and had no idea what she'd said. He turned to the girl, cocking his head as he tried to figure out what she'd asked. "Hm? Oh...sure." He walked over to the girl and sat down, taking the cupcake from the girl and absentmindedly playing with the frosting on it. He wasn't all that sure he wanted to eat, now, though his stomach had quieted down a bit. It was still churning, just not so much. Or maybe he'd just been ignoring it. Either way, he had to tense his hands up to try and keep the shaking away. He'd pressed himself up against Anya the moment he sat down...the girl knew this was hard, but he didn't know how much she understood or really knew. He hadn't exactly told her some things. but she knew him well, better than anyone, and he wasn't normally this fidgety. Well, his face was Stony...blank, really, as he tried to block out any emotion. But his body was fidgety for sure.

Anya have a soft sigh when the boy sat down, but set down a couple of plates and a few bits they could pick from if they so pleased. She did notice the slight shaking of the boy, so gently wrapped an arm around his back and ran her hand up and down his spine soothingly. In truth, she wasn't sure if he had actually noticed it, but she did feel a little better trying to help. Not that it was doing much, though. She did take the cupcake off him after a little while... he was just playing with the frosting, and it was getting pretty much everywhere. "You're alright," she told him again, though it didn't mean anything at this point. Just because she'd said it didn't mean that he'd feel it. She still

wanted to try and get him talking, though, but she just wasn't overly sure how. Sage couldn't be left alone with his own mind, at that point things would just go... wrong. They'd get a whole lot worse. But maybe, if she could get him talking, thinking, he'd be a little less... anxious. "What are you thinking?" The girl murmured softly. It was such a simple question, really, but she did think that he'd have a decent reply to it, considering how he was acting.

Sage kind of blinked and looked over at the girl, sighing and curling up against her side after a moment. "I'm...not sure," he admitted. "A lot." He shrugged slightly and looked back over at Lizzie's grave, which by now looked like nothing had ever happened to the area. "It seems so weird being back here," he admitted. He was always working or dealing with his dad or trying not to starve....just relaxing seemed odd. "And I quite honestly don't know what to think," he admitted softly, looking at the girl, slight panic flickering in his eyes. He really was about to spill over but he just didn't want to. "Anya, if I crack I don't know if I'll ever be able to fix it," he whispered, shaking his head slightly. He could feel the pressure building up again, and by now he was practically gasping for air, trying to stay calm. He wasn't so sure it was working though.

Anya gave a soft nod and wrapped another hand around his side as he curled in. She wanted him to feel safe... this didn't need to be so scary. He didn't need to be so scared. She gently played with his hair for a little while, trying to think of something to say to the boy to calm him down... well, she wasn't sure anything would. She could try her best, but it wouldn't bring his sister back. And he needed her, much more than he needed Anya. "I know," she breathed gently, still running her hands though his hair lightly. "But you're not gonna break, alright," she murmured gently, "and if you do, then we can fix you up again," the girl reassured before pecking him on the cheek. She didn't know if that was true, but she definitely hoped it was. She purposely slowed her breathing, making her breaths a little deeper and her chest rose and fell a little higher when she sucked in a breath. Hopefully, Sage would pick up on the change and find it a little easier to slow his own breathing if she gave him a rhythm.

Sage rested his head on the girl's shoulder with a heavy sigh. It was odd...Anya was here, and he did feel safe with her, but he was also terrified. Feelings had never been his strong suit, especially over complicated ones like he was feeling now. They were like a dam...if he started to cry or whatever he'd wind up doing, it would just oveflow and get worse and worse, and he was worried he'd always have cracks. He couldn't have cracks out here...he had to be strong. He was grasping for something to help him, and Anya was that something....he had subconsciously matched his breathing to hers at some point during their conversation, though he was still shaking. He supposed it was just nerves, though he really didn't know. He told the girl he was terrified of his feelings once, though he wasn't sure if the girl remembered. Really, he supposed it didn't matter, since he would force everything down anyway. He did trust the girl, and he did know she'd do anything to protect him, but he didn't know how she'd even respond if he suddenly broke down. She liked him the way he was...strong. She'd seen him in some bad situations, but that had always been from fighting. Not this kind of thing. Even if he somehow mustered up the courage to cry or whatever...what would she think?

The girl did give a small smile when the boys breathing calmed down a little. She gently took one if his hands and ran her thumb over the back of his hands gently. It was mainly because she wanted him to stop shaking, so he wouldn't just ware himself out... but maybe it's a good thing. He wouldn't be able to lash out if he didn't have the energy to do that. But, to some extent, his whole reaction was alright... she didn't want him to bottle everything up. If he did that, it'd all eat away at him, and it would kill him. She gave a small sigh before pressing a light kiss to his forehead before grabbing a drink and offering it to him. It might not do much, and he might not want it, but she was just trying to find a way to calm him down... and she really wasn't sure what to do about it all.

Sage offered the girl a type of weary smile when she handed him the drink. He knew she was trying to do what she could to help. To find something that might work, that might help him calm down. In truth, he needed time. Time to freak out and worry and then once that was over he could bottle it all up again and go on the way he always had. But at the same time...grieving would be good. He just didn't know if he could put a limit on it. Or what Anya would think if he suddenly broke down right next to her. He knew she wouldn't judge him too harshly, but he was scared to death to make a mistake with the girl. She was the only one who'd loved him, loved his scars and mistakes....but that was going pretty far. And he didn't want to make her love him any less for being...what? A coward? No, that wasn't quite right. Maybe someone who wasn't strong enough to deal with something silly? He didn't know, and really he didn't want to think about it, because it definitely wasn't helping him any. He took a sip of the drink to distract himself, and when he tasted it he blinked and looked down at the cup. He hadn't really been paying attention, so he'd figured it was water, but it had some sort of flavor. It wasn't bad, it was pretty good, he just hadn't realized that. Well, he did feel a bit better. He'd been slightly distracted for a moment, and while he did feel better than before he still felt so close to bubbling over. Too close, really. He supposed Anya could think less of him either way...stupid to keep it all in, or something else bad by letting it out. He'd been told by everyone but her to keep it in...was he making things worse? He didn't know, and that combined with visiting Liz was making his head spin worse than before.

Anya furrowed her brows in reply when the boy tried a smile at her, but she tried to give him one back, too. She needed to be as up beat as she could for him, so that she wouldn't drag him further down into the little pit he was digging himself. She did hope that he'd know she'd always care about him, though... he didn't have to bottle everything up with her. He didn't have to be brave, or keep everything in until he burst. If she could, she'd lift all of his burdens and make everything better for him... stop things hurting as much as it did. The boy probably should have dealt with this, Lizzie's death, when it first happened, but he'd needed time to process. He could grieve now, if he pleased. There really hadn't had the time to do that before... they'd gotten kidnapped and that was it for a long time. But he had the time now, just to sit there and... well, cry, if that's what he felt like. And she'd be there with him, just trying her hardest to make things a bit better, even if it did seem nearly impossible for him. "Good?" She asked with an almost amused smile when the boy took a drink... he looked a little surprised, but that was good if took his mind off of everything. "You know," she sighed as she took the cup off of him and placed it at his side. "You don't need to bottle anything up. I know you're scared of breaking, but I'm here for you. You're allowed to be upset." She looked up before wrapping her arms back around him snugly. "You don't have to be scared, but you don't need to be brave either," the girl added softly, trying another small smile.