{Keenan}

He blushed and then winked at Freyja, "You really should stop complementing me, I mean it," he said with a laugh, "But of course I wore it better. I just agreed to change to save the drama and spare Aleks' ego. I think my father would just kill me if I started a fight at dinner over fashion," Kee rolled his eyes dramatically, "It's only because the old man has no taste. I swear he just owns a hundred copies of the same outfit. If I get like that when I become king, I want you to stake me. I would rather die than have bad taste," just the thought made him feel ill. Dressing like his father was so basic, so boring. What was the point of having access to the best tailors in the country if you just wore the same black suit everyday.

"You just proved my point about the feelings thing. I have absolutely no interest in being human, ew," he said taking another bite of the pie, real food had no right to taste this good, "Although you are right. Ugh I hate that, feelings are dumb and inconvenient yet you are right. We end up at war constantly because the vampires refuse to feel anything and they are bored. It is impossible to be bored when you are fighting for you life. I just don't like how messy it is. I want things to be straight forward and uncomplicated. Not a mess of worrying about how people will feel and how even I feel. It is easier to just not."

Kee let out a soft sigh, she was right. How many people had described him as soulless monster during the war. He didn't mind it at the time but now he wanted to be more. He wasn't evil, or at least he didn't believe so. The public might once they realise he is a halfling but that had nothing to do with who he was as a person, "the effect you have on me is frustrating Freyja. You make me want to feel things, to live and it makes life so messy and terrifying." Heat filled his cheeks, burning his face up to the tips of his pointed ears. He burried his head, "Nooo, are you trying to make me die of embarrasment?" he did of course know what hormoes were, he was a teenager once but it was different for vampires. They were not as passionate as the fae, they didn't feel things as strongly. "Why? This sucks. I do not like it at all," he grumbled, "Can I make it stop? Or am I going to have to get really good at shifting so I can shift and avoid embarassing myself?" Gods he wished the floor would open up and swallow him whole. He wanted to embrace this whole halfling thing, he really did, he just didn't expect to be so embarassed.

This conversation alone made him want to die. It reminded him way too much of the conversation he had with his father as a teenager. That was awkward but this was more so. He'd never really noticed the differences before now, but then he was only shifting as a weapon. He had never tried to live life as a fae.

He furrowed his eyebrows, deep in thought, "there actually is a spell that would allow something like that. It is blood magic and usually used to bind one to a certain form but it can be manipulated," he had learned that spell from his father, who kept a collar with the runes engraved just incase he ever needed a more permanent way to bind Keenan to a form, he instinctively touched his throat. That collar was hell, he genuinely thought he was going to die. It only lasted for a week, until the King was sure that he got the message, but he wouldn't wish it upon his worst enemy. Shifting his attention from the sheer terror, he paid more attention to what Freyja was saying, "The blood thing is different as a vampire once you get over the texture. Like I can't drink it in this form. It's disgusting but when I shift, food is very similar."

He couldn't help but laugh when she asked what they got out of being a vampire, "Look we do have a very long list of weaknesses, holy water, sunlight, silver, wooden stakes and we can't enter religious grounds unless invited but surely the fae have their own weaknesses. I can list one downside already, the hormones that make me feel like a teenager that is hopelessly in love," he grinned at her, "But it's not that bad, we do get immortality, blood magic, strength, speed, enhanced senses and vampire blood does have healing properties. Also we can see in the dark, sometimes we just forget to have any light as we don't really notice," he said sheepishly, "We do throw excellent parties as well, and the fashion, we have exquisite fabrics here," exquisite fabrics that he was continuously having made into new things. It drove his father mad but Keenan's shopping problem was the least of his worries, "I mean do all fae males get as dressed up as we do? I detected makeup on Faustin but I suspect that was Aleksander's doing, as for your other brother..." he trailed off. It was definitely easier to not think about him if he just thought of him as just any other... a very attractive other. Nope didn't work, Keenan had to keep himself from sighing.

He looked down at the pie and his now empty wine glass that he did not hesitate to refill. "Being a halfling might not be so bad, good food, combined with good wine. It's almost enough to counteract all the other stuff that comes with it." The stupid fae hormones that made him feel like an out of control teenager again. He was a prince and far better than this. How did the fae manage?

{Keenan}

There was no way Keenan could get any redder, gods this was embarassing. Perhaps it would be better if he just never shifted again, sure it weakened him but this was just awful. He squirmed, "this is not funny, I have already dealt with this once as a vampire. I was not aware I would have to suffer twice," he whined helplessly. "YEARS?" he squeaked, "I have to suffer for years? Just kill me now, please," he begged, "just let the king execute me at this point. I would almost prefer it," he had never been so embarassed in his life. How the hell was he going to interact with others as a fae if he was stuck like this for years. her next question snapped him out of his rapid downward spiral, "I haven't spent as much time as I should have shifted, made obvious by this hellish situation," he twirled a strand of hair around his finger, "Somewhere between 16 and 19 years in total I would say. All I have to say is thank god this didn't happen while we were at war. How do you fae manage?" he shuddered at the thought. He gasped when she said she would ask her brothers, "don't you dare," he said in horror, he was far too sober to be having this conversation, but he couldn't think of anything worse than involving Faustin or god forbid, Daemon. "Maybe I'll just avoid people for the next few years," he said sheepishly.

Even he had to admit the thing with Taeya and Ronwyn was strange. When they first arrived they all seemed to be joined at the hip and he wondered how he would ever actually get to know the princess with them so fiercely guarding her but now... something has changed. He hadn't seen any of them for a long time, which strange considering Taeya arrived as Freyja's maid. "Perhaps they have found the change in schedule unsettling? That or they may not be entirely comfortable being surrounded by vampires, unlike you, they haven't had the opportunity to learn that we aren't all monsters."

Kee pinched the bridge of his nose, "we are married now, I guess I should tell you the whole story," he said with a sigh, "The Faustin and Aleks thing came about after Aleks and I had been fighting, at least that's what the palace spies say. Aleks and I have been fighting constantly, over literally everything. He won't listen to what I have to say about our relationship, he believes it is more than just friendship," he hesitated, trying to think of the best way to phrase it, "We have, or had an agreement. We all know that I shamelessly flirt with people to get what I want and Aleks, surprisingly has done the same on many occasions. Our rule was that it was okay as there was no emotional attachment. He thinks I have fallen for you. I think once he finds out I am a halfling, our relationship is a good as ruined," Keenan rolled his shoulders to try and get more comfortable, "We had a fight one night and Aleks got ridiculously drunk, as did Faustin. I think they ran into each other in the hall and it's just gone on from there. If it concerns you, I can make sure the spies keep an eye on them?" he suggested feeling rather defeated about the whole Aleks situation.

Keenan refilled his wine glass. He would have to shift again and there was nothing more sobering than that. Especially if he was going to show Monty and Aleks, ugh shifting twice in one day. He really needed to visit Elena for more of that serum. At least it became more manageable everytime he shifted and he needed to spend more time in his Fae form to get used to this infernal hormone thing, especially if he was going to be stuck like this for years. Years. It was different when he was going through it as a vampire, that had been expected and not nearly as intense as it was now. If he'd known he would have to go through it twice, he would have spent more time in his fae form.

Gods and they were planning to visit Sylvia for Yule, pending his father's approval. Freyja didn't need his approval but unfortunately as the crown prince, Keenan essentially belonged to the crown. He missed the freedom that had come with being the spare son. If they were going to Sylvia for Yule and he shifted, he may actually die of embarassment. This was terrible, how did people cope?

"As for residing in different rooms," He sighed, "my father is traditionalist, hence his whole problem with my relationships and his desire for me to find a wife. We should be able to get away with it for now but eventually we will be expected to share. And offense to you, but I much prefer my own space. I also doubt there would be a room with a closet big enough for our combined amount of clothes and I don't know about you but I am not willing to compromise on closet space," he said with a laugh. He pursed his lips, thinking, "We may be able to get away with it as long as people believe we are regularly visiting each others chambers. I will smell like fae anyway so that should be convincing enough for now. If we make sure someone witnesses us visiting eachothers chambers we can always just switch back using the secret passages," he was rambling now, a combination of a plan coming together and the effects of the wine, "remind me to give you a copy of the map to memorise."

{Keenan}

Keenan looked like he was about to cry. He'd already gone through it once already, years ago. It was not fair that he had to suffer through it twice. He was too old to be doing this. He whimpered, "I have been there, done that once already. It was embarassing enough the first time. At least then I was on the frontline and too busy worrying about staying alive to even think about it," now he was surrounded by very attractive others, maybe he would just have to avoid others in his fae form. Yes, that was exactly what he would do. "Gods, could you imagine how my father would react if he found out? Then death would be a mercy."

He winced when she mentioned the moment in the office. It wasn't his finest moment. "If it makes you feel better, we will get to spring something on Monty and Aleks tomorrow." It was a strange sort of irony, before Aleks had been stood beside him as they accused Freyja of being a murderer, now she would be the one behind him as he revealed that he was a halfling to his best friend and sort of lover. What could go wrong?

He understood how she felt about finding new ladies in waiting. He'd dismissed his own staff long ago, much to his father's dismay. "Finding the right staff is challenging. Here it is traditional to have someone dress the crown prince, I however dismissed my staff as I couldn't find the right fit. Now I only occassionally have someone dress me, like today. Gods, you should have seen the laces that ran down the back of that vest. It was no easy feat to get out of either," he said with a laugh, "You have the resources of the crown, so do what you need to do to find yourself new staff that you are happy with," he said with a smile.

He nodded when she mentioned silver jewellery, "I mean tecchnically you could wear it but then you may accidentally burn every vampire you touch. I'm fine in this form but let me tell you, silver burns can be nasty," he shuddered dramatically. He raised an eyebrow when she mention her underthings draw, "And what do you keep in there hmm?" he said with a wink.

He laughed when she mentioned that Faustin was only interested in females, "That was not what I was worried about, but it is an interesting thing to know. I can't flirt with him if I want something then," he sighed dramatically, "I guess I'll just have to keep flirting with Daemon then," he said nudging her with his elbow.

Mate. He hadn't even considered the possibility that he may have one. He just assumed he was going to live his life with several semi long term relationships but nothing that would last forever. A mate. The thought made him feel all warm and fuzzy inside, or was that the wine? Either way he liked it, the idea that he could have someone that wanted him for him and more than status or a short term fling. One could dream at least.

At least Freyja was better at coming up with a plan than he was, "There is more than enough room for one of those couches in my quarters," he said with a laugh, "There is probably enough room for another bed if we are being honest."

{Keenan}

Keenan grumbled, "I do not like being normal, It ruins my image of perfection." Her yawning was enough to set him off. "I think we are far beyond me trying to keep up my image around you, so I am going to be honest," he said with a laugh, "the second I lay down, I will probably pass out. I am exhausted. I hope you don't mind if I take the couch? I don't have it in me to do another shift today without passing out and crossing the hall like this is far too risky."

He flashed her a smile, he really did appreciate all the effort she was going to. "I am sure I have a cousin or someone that would be honored to take up the role. The human population would likely be honored if you were willing to consider them. I know you would have to replace them sooner but it would mean a lot to the people. They feel that sometimes they are neglected by us, the vampire leaders." He nodded when she mentioned her desire to have started all this earlier, "Even the decision of our marriage was rushed. My father had been looking for suitors for me for a long time and I just kept sccaring them off, deliberately. He decided on you and gave me an ultimatum. This is far better than I could have hoped for," he said gesturing to their pile of rubbish, "I was just hoping not be exiled, instead, I gained a friend." He groaned throwing his head back, "Now I'm being sappy."

Keenan gasped when she mentioned orange, "You wouldn't dare. No. Please tell me you're joking. Wear literally any other colour," he shook his head, "that man had no fashion sense. Are all fae that fashion blind?" he asked in disbelief.

He laughed when she said he would be lucky to leave with all his teeth, "remind me not to drink too much around him then." He didn't understand why Faust would be so offended, it wasn't like Kee freaked every time a woman flirted with him. Ugh men, so dramatic. "Fifty seven years," Keenan whispered, "What happened?" He felt sorry for the male. From what he had understood so far, mates were bonded on a biological level. He almost wanted to give him a hug... almost, there was still the whole mind reading thing that made him wary enough to keep his distance, "No wonder he's like he is... Maybe being friends with Aleks is a good thing, although they may indulge each others bad behaviour at least they aren't alone."

He looked over at Freyja as she climbed into bed, "goodnight Wifey." He took a swig from that blue serum Freyja fetched for him earlier and let it take effect. He was out almost immediately.

Keenan woke before Freyja. He groan softly as he forced himself to shift. It was fun to sit in his fae form for the night but he had duties before they left and those involved him being able to walk around the halls. At least he was gradually getting faster at it, although this time he gripped the edge of the couch so he wouldn't collapse.

Looking over his shoulder he quietly snuck out of her room. He sighed when he saw yet another letter from the king, it was never a good thing, usually jus a summons so his father could yell at him. Carefully breaking the seal he steeled himself for whatever horrors it may contain...a ball. A masquerade ball no less. The king was hosting a ball to see them off. Strange. Calling over a servant, he ordered blood for himself and breakfast for Freyja. He was starving, although this was a different kind of hunger. The insatiable thirst that came with being a vampire.

A couple of glasses in and the muscle soreness was beginning to lift. He would be stuck with the ache but the excruiciating pain had subsided. He also sent summons for Claude, Aleks and Montague. He was going to tell them he was a halfling before he lost the nerve. It was better coming from him, rather than palace gossip.

Finally he had to decide what to wear. That was a momentous task in itself, of course he would change for the ball but that just added an additional layer of complexity. He needed something lighter for during the day, especially if he was going to be shifting but his outfit for the ball had to be perfect. Blue maybe?

Slipping into a light weight grey suit he walked back across the hall to Freyja, "I need help... I have absolutely no idea what I should wear tonight," he said in despair.

{Keenan}

Keenan floped dramatically onto the couch, "Have you not seen the letter," he said in mock horror, "My dearest father has decided to host a masquerade ball and I have no idea what to wear, or accessorise and I have not been given enough time to prepare." He groaned, "That man has no idea how long it takes me to get ready, or at least likes to make me rush."

He sat up and offered her a smile, "I do like that dress. It's nice to see you do have some fashion sense," he said with a laugh before grimacing, "I definitely drank too much last night, that and shifting were not a good mix. Although consuming fae blood before has allowed me to bounce back faster, so thank you for that," he said with a wink, "I am surprised I have any teeth left. I do not think I have consumed so many sweets in my life."

Being back in his vampire form was a cool comfort, controlled and at ease. A small part of him missed the warmth that came with being fae, when he shifted, he was undeniably alive, now he was back to being expected to be the cold unfeeling prince. He was conflicted, was he only more comfortable as a vampire because it was what he was used to? Could he find more joy as a fae, ridiculous hormones and all? Was it truly the worst thing if he was not perfect? A tingle went down his spine, causing him to shiver, thinking like this was dangerous, it could get him killed, or worse stripped of his power and bound to this form. He squared his shoulders and lifted his chin, "the inner circle is meeting in an hour in my study, I would love if you would attend, however after last time I completely understand if you are unwilling, he gulped, despite his impecible control, there was a small amount of fear in his eyes, only noticeable if you were really watching him, "It is time for them to learn the truth, even if it will destroy relationships. They should not hear it as idle gossip." he let out a soft sigh, "I have to prepare... outfit selections will have to wait," there was a hint of sadness in his voice.

This meeting was the most terrifying thing he had ever organised. He'd already shifted, figuring it was easier to show than try and explain it. Claude was surprised, only because he was being so open about it, "They aren't here yet, there is still time to change your mind," she protested. Keenan shook his head and ifted his chin stubbornly.

Monty and Aleks entered together, the door clicking shut nehind them. Both eyes wide and confused, Aleks spoke first, "Where's Keenan? And who is this," he said gesturing to the fae sat behind the desk. Keenan wasn't sure what hurt more, the fact that Aleks didn't recognise him or the look on their faces when they entered. "Sit," he said, speaking with a slight lisp, he flexed his jaw and tried again, "I am sat right in front of you," he said softly to Aleks.

"No," Monty whispered.

Keenan sighed, He was hoping to get out of shifting again, unfortunately, things didn't work out how he wanted, ever. He gripped the edge of the table as he shifted, trying to hide the pain as much as possible.

Aleks gasped and Monty paled. After a terse silence, Montague spoke, "How? Has it always been like this?"

Keenan nodded, grateful that despite everything his closest friend was willing to listen, "My mother was fae, making me a halfling. It gives me the ability to shift between the two forms, although I have spent the majority of my life in this form," he let out an unsteady breath, absolutely exhausted, he needed to feed, "Only a handful of people know, so you have to understand that there will be dire consequences if this gets out before I am ready."
Monty nodded solemnly but Aleks looked annoyed, "Does she know?" Keenan nodded, "When did she find out?" Aleks demanded.

"Last night," Keenan said softly.

Aleks whimpered, "You told her before me? After everything? We've been together for a decade and you told the fae you knew a week before you told me?" he said growing increasingly agitated.

"She wasn't supposed to find out-"

"No," Aleks interrupted, holding back tears, "You don't trust me. I can't do this. Romantically we are done. I'll remain part of your inner circle because of my duties at court but other than that, we are done," with that Aleks stormed out of the office.

Keenan looked at Montague, "I understand that you may wish to be transferred out of my services and I am willing to facillitate that."

Monty shook his head, "No, I need time to process and then we need to talk but I won't abandon you Kee."

Keenan gave him a grateful nod. " I need time," he said fighting back tears, "You are both dismissed, I will see you at the ball."

The second Claude and Monty left, he shifted again. He wanted to feel this. His magic tugged at the shadows in the room, tied to his emotions and then it disappeared. Tears trickled down his cheek before, he was actually sobbing. This hurt more than he thought it would.

{Aleksander}

This whole thing with Keenan had left him reeling. Aleks sniffed, fighting back tears, as he walked down the halls of the castle, the rooms feeling significantly larger than before. He needed someone to talk to. Knocking twice he waited, "Faust, can we talk for a few minutes?"