Quinn let tears drip from her eyes as she walked away. Why was she doing this. What was she doing!? No... nothing was right. Nothing would ever be right.

Four days later, she was in a small inn, and had just finished feeding the babies when Jack walked in. "What are you doing here?" She asked, black circles under her eyes from lack of sleep.

-

Jack approached the girl and sat down next to her, rather forcefully tugging her close. "Quinn, you need to get over Sage. What did he do for you? Be with me, instead." Jack said quietly, a bit of a venomous tone biting at his voice as he leaned in closer, his breath hot on her neck. "I'm better than he ever was."

-

Quinn recoiled slightly with a snarl. "You're lying. Get away from me, Jack! What has come over you?" She asked.

-

Jack scowled and tugged her closer. "You're not leaving now." He hissed, forcibly pressing his lips against hers.

-

Quinn let out a muffled growl of anger, fear racking her body as Jack spoke. She tried to scramble away, but she couldn't move, pinned by his weight. "Get off of me!" She coughed, disgust and terror forging into her expression. She recoiled and punched him as hard as she could, making him snarl with anger and pain.

-

Jack glared st her, his hand flying towards her face as he slapped her. "Don't touch me." He hissed, pinning her down again.

-

Quinn let out a yelp and groped for her dagger. She stabbed it into his hand, then grabbed the babies and bolted. Her breath ragged, panting, her hair wild, she ran away from the town, her head reeling. How could she have made such a mistake. It took her a day to stumble her way back to the cabin, hoping, praying Sage would be there, but it was empty. So empty. Tears welled up in her eyes again as she staggered in to see the ring on the pillow. "What have I done!?" Quinn sobbed, grabbing it and gently setting the crying babies down as she cradled it in her Hands. How had she been so stupid. She gritted her teeth, determined to find him. She wasn't going to let this go. Sliding the ring into her tunic pocket, she made Caspian and Frynn comfortable, fed them, then went outside and tied her hair back. She then opened her mind, reaching out, trying to find the familiar feel of his. She needed to find him.

Sage had absentmindedly wandered.... whereever he could find something to hunt. No, not hunt....he needed to kill. To get his anger out somehow. Not even that....no, he wasn't angry. Not anymore. Empty was the better word for it. He'd been hoping that a hunt would have awoken something, anything, even if it was just a primal instinct to kill. He could work with that. Take as many humans out with him as he could. But no....even as he crouched in the middle of a pile of dead, torn apart farm animals....he still felt nothing. At least, not until the smell of blood made him gag, and spew up his stomach contents. Which wasn't much, considering he'd already thrown up outside the cabin a couple of times.

He stood there for a moment, not moving when he heard a gunshot and the bullet hit his shoulder. He glanced down at the blood, then the shaking farmer who held the gun, walking slowly, pointedly towards the man, holding his gaze until, finally he was close enough to grab the gun and snap the man's neck in one fell swoop. His lip curled in distaste as he left him laying there, tossing the nasty weapon aside as he moved on, slowly, blood dripping from his arm. He didn't feel anything....there was a slight, dull pain, which was familiar enough that he welcomed it. It was at least something. He felt a sort of laugh bubbling up in his throat, and he turned towards the other farms, no longer killing for food or to try and feel the bloodlust that .made him so enjoy hunting, but....he welcomed the farmers. Their weapons. The way they made him feel something when they hit him, shot him, or... whatever else they did. He wandered aimlessly, unknowingly making a loop. He hadn't eaten , hadn't had water, hadn't slept. Just days of this slowly walking, hoping to feel something. Eventually though, all the farmers in the area had left of had been killed, so he moved to slide into the barn of the first man he'd killed, into the stalls and sliding down inside of one with a shudder. He really was the monster they'd made him out to be. He should be in a cage. But this was the best he'd get. He shivered, the day having been a cold, and rather wet one...but made no move to stand, no move to get up and warm his body, which had become frighteningly thin. He didn't make a move to eat or sleep or drink either. He just...sat there, breaths rasping low and long and painful in his throat.

Quinn focused harder, blood dripping from her arms and back where Jack had hit her and scratched her, just trying to feel any sign of anything. After 10 long, agonizing minutes of stretching her brain thin, she felt the tickling sensation of an almost familiar mind... but it was so different at the same time. Empty. Dull. In so much pain, she had to jerk back her consciousness. She did this. This was all her fault. She wanted to fall down and sob, but she couldn't stop. As it started to rain, she gathered up what she could, bundled up the roots that survived, herbs, and blankets. She then let out a high pitched whistle. It echoed for miles, and she thought nothing would happen, but then ... hoofbeats. Sahara had promised never to be far, even though she left, and now here she was. "Oh my gosh Quinn... what happened..." she whinnied, trotting over and nuzzling Quinn. "No time. We need to find Sage." She rasped, holding both babies, wrapped in a blanket, and mounting. Seconds later they were cantering through the cold, dark forest. On and on, towards where she had felt that mind. For almost 15 hours they traveled nonstop, with Quinn just trying to keep Caspian and Frynn warm and fed, even though it rained most of the way. She was soaked to the bone, and hadn't eaten in days, but she knew it was all her fault. She had to fix this. Any way she could. They soon came upon a stench so terrible even she could smell it. Rotten meat. Quinn closed her eyes as they quickly went past, her stomach heaving. She didn't want to see that. Imagine who did it. Soon, they approached a barn, and after opening her consciousness for a split second, she knew he was here. Just... just in case he was too lost he didn't even recognize her, she told Sahara to watch the babies so they didn't get hurt. She then bolted into the barn, immediately seeing the now skinny man she had hurt so badly. Not caring what happened, Quinn ran in and threw her arms around him. She didn't care if he ripped her apart. She deserved it. Burying her head in his shoulder, she just held on tighter.

Sage hadn't been aware of very much for a while before Quinn had come to the barn. Of course, it didn't help that a shot to the head had caused one eye to...well, not do its job. The bullet hadn't hit anything major besides that, he didn't think....and he wasn't sure to curse or thank the thick bones his mother had given him. But he only had one good eye now, as far as he knew, and he was rather on edge from...well, everything. So when something, someone, kept at him, he didn't have time to register if it was good or bad, or who it was, he'd jerked away with a halfhearted snarl, something like panic flaring in his gaze before it faded again and he pressed himself against the far wall of the stall, breath hitching when he noticed who it was. Well...he would recognize her scent anywhere. She was on his blind side so he couldn't see her...and he wasn't sure he wanted to. What had she come here for? He cocked his head slightly, sightlessly, bleakly in her direction, the rattle of his breath the only noise as he shut everything off. Guarding himself, against anything that she might throw at him. "Come to finish the job then," he finally asked, a cruel like smile playing across his face, though there was no emotion to it. "none of the farmers could manage to do it. Though maybe that's because they hadn't started it." She'd know what he meant by that...and she'd know that she'd started this off. His dying. She'd killed his mind, his emotions.... everything but his body really. Which was well on its way out, he could tell from the amount of blood in the stall. His blood, on the ground, the walls, still dripping steadily from his body. Once it ran thin, he'd be gone. He wasn't sure he cared.

(Gosh, that's so morbid XDD

I love it. The imagination. Wow. At the same time, it makes me want to come into the rp and strangle Quinn to death :D))

-

Quinn knew how he was going to react, so when he jerked away she didn't try to go closer, but when she saw him... what was left of her heart shattered. This was all her fault. All. Her. Fault. She was a MONSTER. His face.. bloodied... broken... one eye almost completely gone, his whole body shot up and torn apart... it was so horrible. So, so horrible. She didn't even know what to think. His words made her mind go numb, but she tried, so hard, not to do anything. Instead, she sidled over to the side that his still functioning... or it looked intact.. eye was on. "Sage, I know nothing I can ever say will make up for this. Nothing anyone could ever say or do would ever come close. But I'm going to try. I'm going to try my best. I am so, so sorry. I- I don't even know where to begin. How s-selfish and stupid I was, how I h-hurt you... I don't know how to start justifying any of it. This is all my fault. What happened to you. It's all. All my fault. I was so stupid, such an idiot to ever believe in Jack, and I can't say I'm sorry enough. It will never work. But I'm not leaving you. I love you. It just took me a while to realize how much. Everything I said came from a place that got ripped out when Jack showed his true self. I can't even begin to imagine the pain you're in, or- o-or even if there's no pain, because everything is numb. I'll do anything to try and help, even though I know nothing will justify what I've done. I love you, even if you don't believe it, can't believe it." She whispered, though every word was loud enough to hear. She couldn't let herself break, not now. This wasn't ever about her. She wasn't even sure if she could save him. So much blood. She could almost smell death. Quinn couldn't let him die. But, she had a feeling he wasn't going to let her help, either. This was all.. all her fault.

(loll, ik I like to make him struggle a bit xD. But also...I kinda want to strangle both of them at the moment lol)

Something flickered in his gaze for a small, small moment when he saw her move to the side he could see her on. When he saw how miserable she looked. It was almost enough for him to let his walls down. He'd started to, just for a moment, and then she'd opened her mouth to speak and he'd dropped his shields again, slammed them down hard on anything he could see, could hear. He was listening, of course....she was right there, and he didn't have much of a choice in the matter. She seemed sincere enough, but...."love is for fools," he practically spat at the girl. "At least in my world," he added. Though, when she apologized, he heasitated, paused, struggling with himself to decide what to do. He opened his mouth to speak, then closed it again, not sure how to explain himself. How to...figure out what to do. He wanted, more than anything to jump into her arms and sob, and tell her he loved her back. He also wanted nothing more than to run, and hide, and let himself die in the brush somewhere she couldn't see him. See this. What he really was, deep down inside. Eventually he sighed, and knelt down in front of the girl, breathing labored and with the rank of not eating or drinking. "Do you want to know why I sent you away," he whispered. Well, he'd suggested it, but in a yelling tone. He'd practically told her to get lost. The same small, cruel smile played up on his lips as before, still voice of all emotion. "Because this," he said flatly, gesturing to himself. "Is what I am." His good eye glittered, from what he couldn't tell. Tears, death slowly sliding it's way into his mind, or maybe a small glimmer of the love he'd once believed he could hold, even with the cracks in his heart. Well, now he didn't have one. "I'm not something that could ever have given you what you needed." His eyes fluttered to the doors, where he could heard the kids outside. "What they needed." He turned his eyes back to Quinn's face, meeting her tear stained face with his flat one. "I gave you everything. Everything I had was yours. And it still wasn't good enough," he whispered, unable to stop the kiss that came from deep, deep within him, where he'd pushed all his emotions away. "Im not good enough." He drew back then, letting his aching body slump against the wall, looking down at his blood stained body, some his, some not. A lot not. "They were all right," he noted with a chuckle. "I should be in a cage." His lips tightened. "Or better yet, shot in the head. With a bullet big enough to kill this time," he added with a snort. "These hunters...they all are right," he hissed, before drawing in a shuddering breath as his breathing labored. "You should go," he finally signed, shoulders slumping. "Don't remember me for this." If she wanted to know what he was thinking, really thinking, she could look in his mind. He'd felt the tug earlier, when she'd first found him. And even though it all hurt so much, and he could feel himself slipping away, getting colder and colder.....there was something in him that wanted her here. Needed her here, with him. Even if it was only leading to another hurt. The other half screamed no, to his at her to leave. But not to hurt her. Never her. Even now, like this....he couldn't do it.

(I do want to strangle both of them. With a rope that'll give slivers XD)

-

Quinn trembled slightly, not because of her own self pity, but immense guilt. Gut wrenching sadness. She couldn't help him. She didn't know how. He was broken, and she did it. This was all her fault. As he started speaking, she hung her head, words she wanted to say ripping at her throat as she held them in. She wanted to tell him how much she loved him again, but she couldn't bring herself to speak. "That's not true, Sage. This isn't you." She whispered, looking at him as he knelt down. He would never understand, and that was her fault. Why did she ever speak. Why would she hurt him like this. "But there's where you're wrong, Sage. I know you. This isn't you. You are the sweetest, more caring person ever. You used to love me, too, but of course, I ruined it." Her voice caught and she stopped, trying not to let her face crumple. "That's not even close to true, though. You gave me everything, you're right. And the fact is, whether you believe it or not, I'm not good enough for you. No where near good enough. You gave me everything, and all I did was hurt you. I can't express how sorry I am, or how much I want to make it right. It's not possible for me to fix this. I wish I could. You are more than good enough." She mumbled, watching him back up, defeated. She loomed down at her hands, obviously trembling, and she wished, with all her heart, she could rewrite the past. "I'm not leaving you. You mean everything to me... it doesn't matter if you believe it or not. You did everything right. I'm so sorry." She whispered again, inching the slightest bit closer to brush her fingers across his face. "Please, Sage. Please. Let me help." Quinn begged, her eyes pleading.

(yepppp loll)

Sage said nothing in response to the girls comments, nostrils flaring slightly the only thing that had moved on his face when she said she wasn't enough for him. That's she'd failed him, hurt him. She'd hurt him, yes....and he supposed in some way that was a failure. "Maybe so," he murmured. "But I also had all the best days of my life with you," he mused, something very small sparking in his eye, not wanting her to feel like this . To end up like him. "I hurt you first, Quinn," he murmured, swallowing thickly. "You'd never have reacted like that if I hadn't done....other things," he admitted, voice halting, wanting to admit it and not wanting to admit it all at once. He watched her move, and had prepared for her to walk out of the building and leave him there again, when he just pinched his lips together when she said she wouldn't leave him, saying nothing. He'd just stared at the ground, then, struggling to take a breath in by then. But, she surprised him with her fingers on his face. He jerked at first, hissing slightly, as if she'd burned him before stilling, letting her fingers stay on his skin, pulse pulsing at his throat rapidly. The small flicker in his eye had grown slightly by then, but at her touch he caved. He squeezed his eyes shut, willing himself to take it in stride, not to cry, not to make a fool out of himself. But he did anyway, finally breaking and sagging against her with a heavy sob, like those first few hours at the cabin. "God, Quinn," he managed to rasp, just shaking his head, wondering why she'd come back to him.

Quinn wanted quite badly to just give up and curl up on the ground in a pool of blood and pass out, but she couldn't do that. She had to get through to Sage- she couldn't leave him. She wasn't going to let their precious children grow up without a father. At his quietly mused words, a small flutter of hope stirred in her chest. She knew she didn't deserve to be forgiven. She had done far too much wrong. She just hoped and prayed he'd let her help him. At least until he was less dead than alive. "No... none of this is in any way your fault. I was so selfish and stupid.. I don't even know..." she trailed off, refusing to let more tears leak out. This was her fault. She shouldn't be the one being a weakling. When he hissed and jerked away, she flinched slightly, hesitating, wondering if she should move, but she couldn't. She couldn't leave him. Partially happy and relieved and terrified and remorseful and guilty and sad tears leaked down her cheeks as he collapsed into her. She didn't hold him tightly, as she didn't want to somehow make the many wounds and bullet holes he had worse, but she did feel like holding him and never letting him go again. "I love you..." she whispered, knowing nothing would make it up, but still feeling like saying it over and over and over. Still trembling, she sucked in a shaky breath, not caring that the stench of blood was stronger than his scent... she just wanted to hold the smell of the real him forever. That mixture of oaks and the woodsy smell, the smell of pine needles and fresh air... it was still there. "You need help..." she finally whispered, reaching into her tunic pocket and drawing out a wad of bandages. "Let me help, please.."

Sage found himself just clinging to the girl, once he'd started he just..couldn't stop. He lay there, shaking, tears running through the mud and blood on his face, leaving stark lines of skin showing through the grime. He couldn't really breath though, so he reined himself in after a moment, taking a shuddering breath and glancing over at the bandages Quinn held, a half smile forming on his face. "I think you'll need more than that," he mused, but wiped his face with an apologeetic murmur to the girl, shifting so she could bind the wounds, to stop the bleeding until they could get somewhere she could actually get the bullets out, clean the wounds, that sort of thing. He stayed nearby, not wanting to leave, but also terrified something would happen. What if she was only helping him because he was dying? She could very well patch him up and leave again. No....no she wouldn't do that. Right? He was finding it hard to breath, to talk, now...so he rasped. "Look into my mind," to her, slowly going downhill now that he was more aware of it all.