Horse Eden Eventing Game
Horse Eden Eventing Game


Year: 200   Season: Summer   
$: 0
Forecast: Evening Thunderstorms, Hail Possible
Forecast:
Thu 06:58pm  
Stables Online:  137 
Chatbox
Glacier Bay Cove
06:58:48 Glacier Kittens
Interesting, Wild
WildWind
06:58:20 Wild
oh nothing. I was on the barn page and it goes all the way down to barns for me when I clicked on it.
that is if you are talking to me
Mystic Star
06:57:08 
It's cute!
Nightingales Ridge
06:57:04 𔓘 Issy
What do you mean by the last comment?
WildWind
06:45:31 Wild
(scroll to the top it will go to the bottom)
WildWind
06:45:08 Wild
-HEE Click-
I updated my profile! what you all think?
Rubygem-Chenya
06:45:05 Ruby/Cheshire
Well I gotta go now byee
Mythological
06:44:33 Crowley | Krampus
Fossil
I'm adding chickens to that list.
Ranch Lands Training
06:42:30 Lilly/PON Addict
Oooh highlands! I love mine, I can't wait to breed her in the spring
Rubygem-Chenya
06:37:27 Ruby/Cheshire
Granny
My mom loves these cows so my dad bought this cow for her so this will be fun since we haven't had cows in years
Circle Star RIDs
06:35:25 Granny C
Ruby - some of my in-laws raise Highlands.
They can be so sweet.
Rubygem-Chenya
06:33:44 Ruby/Cheshire
I think she's young but I'm not sure
Rubygem-Chenya
06:33:23 Ruby/Cheshire
Granny
I don't know all I know is that she's pregnant
PK Rescue Stable
06:31:31 Fossil-sore
hahaha Myth I know you do
Circle Star RIDs
06:31:12 Granny C
Ruby - how old is the cow you're expecting ?
Mythological
06:31:06 Crowley | Krampus
Fossil
And I stand by it lmao
PK Rescue Stable
06:29:28 Fossil-sore
to be fair, I've never liked them. or goats
Rubygem-Chenya
06:26:13 Ruby/Cheshire
Where I live right now it was a swamp that froze so umm this is fun ( it unfroze again but still)
Rubygem-Chenya
06:25:19 Ruby/Cheshire
Our*
PK Rescue Stable
06:25:08 Fossil-sore
oh lol but still, you are the only one I've ever heard say that lol

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Chatbox
Glacier Bay Cove
06:58:48 Glacier Kittens
Interesting, Wild
WildWind
06:58:20 Wild
oh nothing. I was on the barn page and it goes all the way down to barns for me when I clicked on it.
that is if you are talking to me
Mystic Star
06:57:08 
It's cute!
Nightingales Ridge
06:57:04 𔓘 Issy
What do you mean by the last comment?
WildWind
06:45:31 Wild
(scroll to the top it will go to the bottom)
WildWind
06:45:08 Wild
-HEE Click-
I updated my profile! what you all think?
Rubygem-Chenya
06:45:05 Ruby/Cheshire
Well I gotta go now byee
Mythological
06:44:33 Crowley | Krampus
Fossil
I'm adding chickens to that list.
Ranch Lands Training
06:42:30 Lilly/PON Addict
Oooh highlands! I love mine, I can't wait to breed her in the spring
Rubygem-Chenya
06:37:27 Ruby/Cheshire
Granny
My mom loves these cows so my dad bought this cow for her so this will be fun since we haven't had cows in years
Circle Star RIDs
06:35:25 Granny C
Ruby - some of my in-laws raise Highlands.
They can be so sweet.
Rubygem-Chenya
06:33:44 Ruby/Cheshire
I think she's young but I'm not sure
Rubygem-Chenya
06:33:23 Ruby/Cheshire
Granny
I don't know all I know is that she's pregnant
PK Rescue Stable
06:31:31 Fossil-sore
hahaha Myth I know you do
Circle Star RIDs
06:31:12 Granny C
Ruby - how old is the cow you're expecting ?
Mythological
06:31:06 Crowley | Krampus
Fossil
And I stand by it lmao
PK Rescue Stable
06:29:28 Fossil-sore
to be fair, I've never liked them. or goats
Rubygem-Chenya
06:26:13 Ruby/Cheshire
Where I live right now it was a swamp that froze so umm this is fun ( it unfroze again but still)
Rubygem-Chenya
06:25:19 Ruby/Cheshire
Our*
PK Rescue Stable
06:25:08 Fossil-sore
oh lol but still, you are the only one I've ever heard say that lol

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than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.






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Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1 

   Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 07:25 PM


Rivendell Steeds
 
Posts: 1207
#980572
Give Award
Okay, so I got bored a few weeks ago, and decided to start writing a novel in my boredom. I've -technically- written a first chapter, besides this short introduction, but I honestly think I lost my imagination for it. I won't be posting that here (yet), however, here is the introduction. Let me know what you think!

I'm basically going to treat this forum as a wiki for this novel, and a place for suggestions on it. If you have any name ideas, let me know!

Pronuciation help:
Yilyviad - (Yee-Leh-vee-add)
Leolwin - (Lee-OH-L-w-ih-n)
Plyth - (Pl-eye-th)
Mythius - (M-ih-th-EE-us)
Ryenni - (R-ee-eh-nee)
Zykria - (Z-ih-cr-ee-a)
Octrey - (Awe-c-tree)


- Introduction -
The roaring winds sweep past as we go. The fearsome cries of the nearby fractures surround the cove. As the waves crash against the rough edges of the cliffs, so do the other riders. It’s just us. Us, against the swarms of the hideous beasts we call fractures. It always makes me sad to think these creatures were once leolwins.

A long time ago, we elves weren’t the only life-bringing creatures in Yilyviad, there were also leolwins. These magical beasts were giant, and beautiful. With wings like dragons, and the body of a canine, they ruled fairly over all other creatures. We lived in harmony with these creatures, but in the end, it was us who destroyed them.

Throughout history, elves were known to be fearsome warriors, and great allies, but that all changed when the plyths came along. The plyths were a form of corrupted elves that had been tortured and left for dead. Their hatred for our kind grew so much that they would cut their own ears off to not look like us. Soon enough, they sought to destroy the thing we valued above all.

On the day we call “The Accident to Change it All”, my youngest brother Mythius let in a plyth child. She told him her name was Ryenni, and that her ears had been injured in an encounter with a griffin. He led her directly to the heart of Zykria, looking to get her into a temporary home. It was then when she made her move. Using a concealed staff, she knocked out Mythius, and set a beacon for the plyth warriors to teleport to.

One by one, the leolwins were infected by the spells used on them, and all but a few were turned into ravengeous monsters. Many surviving leolwins fled to the upper regions of Octrey, to live in hiding. The rest coincide with us elves, helping fight against the plyths. Some are used as mounts in battles, others as decoys.

Extra Info:
Setting - This story takes place in 3026, in the far future. Humanity resorted to war, and ended up destroying most of Earth in WWIV. The elves stayed in hiding throughout the reign of the humans, but emerged to end the destruction and violence they caused. Most of humanity has died off, and all that remains of the humans are the half-elves; the result of the cross-breeding of humans and elves. Since the elves came into power in 2079, all magical creatures were able to return to thrive on Earth.

Inspirations - Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, The Unwanteds, Nier: Automata, and many, many more fantasy/equine novels.

Things to Note - This is a WIP. Not the finished, or even halfway done product. Also, this isn't a fanfic. Ideas may have aspects that other novels share, like magic, mythical beasts, etc. but no main ideas are ripped off/stolen.

What do you think I should add to this novel? Should I continue writing it? Feedback is well appreciated!

Edited at April 15, 2022 07:30 PM by Rivendell Steeds
Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 09:26 PM


FirstLightFarms

Trivia Team
 
Posts: 4043
#980598
Give Award
Very cool concept! I'd be intrigued in where you go with it :)

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