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Circle Star RIDs
02:51:19 Granny C
Husband was dead set on the name, so Jody became Jodi
Sunset River Arabian
02:51:08 Athena - AA/TB
All 8 of my moms kids were mysteries lol 5 girls and 3 boys. I think she was pretty satisfied because it was broken up into 2 girls, 3 boys and 3 girls. Most of us 1.5-2 years apart
♦Interstellar Path
02:50:02 Aura / Pea
Hey chat!
Guinness Hollow
02:47:58 Dimmed | RID
C, that's happened with my mom for my older sister lol in 1993 😂 she was supposed to be a Nathaniel. Came out without the parts
Circle Star RIDs
02:45:33 Granny C
Everyone was convinced my 1st born would be a boy. Scans even showed what appeared to be a little penis.
Then boom, out popped a girl !
RiverView Ponies
02:45:01 Willow/Lil
times kicked by Nigel: 111
times Nigel cleaned: 18
I didn't think it was that bad lol
Guinness Hollow
02:44:39 Dimmed | RID
-HEE Click-
Oooh
Guinness Hollow
02:36:54 Dimmed | RID
We knew from the e moment we transferred our first son that it was a boy. This second one however we were convinced was a girl! Had dreams and everything. Nope, double confirmed boy. Waiting for the anatomy scan to triple confirm lol
Stormsong Manor
02:35:18 Ven
Me too. And it was always painless in my dreams. It ended up being that way when I had a csection because his birth itself caused zero pain in the moment
MakeEm Fancy
02:35:01 Ally 💜
I found out at 19 weeks with my first and we did a surprise gender with my second
Nightingales Ridge
02:34:42 𔓘 Issy
I dreamed I was having a boy
Stormsong Manor
02:34:13 Ven
I actually knew quite early on, around 12 weeks, but it wasn't a definite because he was still small on the scan. But there was a definite peener there too
Nightingales Ridge
02:34:06 𔓘 Issy
We found out at 20 weeks too. There he was plain as day 3 legs splayed out... lol
Guinness Hollow
02:33:53 Dimmed | RID
Absolutely a blessing Issy 🥰 thank you. Both my boys are massive blessings
Nightingales Ridge
02:33:00 𔓘 Issy
Dimmed I will be thinking of you <3 what a little blessing you carry
Guinness Hollow
02:32:54 Dimmed | RID
LOL Ven that's amazing. We couldn't wait tha long and did an early at home gender test
Stormsong Manor
02:31:47 Ven
Our gender reveal party was a quick text to a family group chat that he had a peener at my 20 week scan
Guinness Hollow
02:31:13 Dimmed | RID
Me too, Issy 🥰 that's the most important for us. I've had a lot of anxiety this pregnancy though so praying it continues to go smoothly
Nightingales Ridge
02:30:03 𔓘 Issy
Interesting. Each to their own. I'm happy you have 2 healthy babies <3
Nordahl
02:29:54 Athena | RID/KNN
But to be fair I also dont think I'll ever have kids as I dont feel being a mom is my calling

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Circle Star RIDs
02:51:19 Granny C
Husband was dead set on the name, so Jody became Jodi
Sunset River Arabian
02:51:08 Athena - AA/TB
All 8 of my moms kids were mysteries lol 5 girls and 3 boys. I think she was pretty satisfied because it was broken up into 2 girls, 3 boys and 3 girls. Most of us 1.5-2 years apart
♦Interstellar Path
02:50:02 Aura / Pea
Hey chat!
Guinness Hollow
02:47:58 Dimmed | RID
C, that's happened with my mom for my older sister lol in 1993 😂 she was supposed to be a Nathaniel. Came out without the parts
Circle Star RIDs
02:45:33 Granny C
Everyone was convinced my 1st born would be a boy. Scans even showed what appeared to be a little penis.
Then boom, out popped a girl !
RiverView Ponies
02:45:01 Willow/Lil
times kicked by Nigel: 111
times Nigel cleaned: 18
I didn't think it was that bad lol
Guinness Hollow
02:44:39 Dimmed | RID
-HEE Click-
Oooh
Guinness Hollow
02:36:54 Dimmed | RID
We knew from the e moment we transferred our first son that it was a boy. This second one however we were convinced was a girl! Had dreams and everything. Nope, double confirmed boy. Waiting for the anatomy scan to triple confirm lol
Stormsong Manor
02:35:18 Ven
Me too. And it was always painless in my dreams. It ended up being that way when I had a csection because his birth itself caused zero pain in the moment
MakeEm Fancy
02:35:01 Ally 💜
I found out at 19 weeks with my first and we did a surprise gender with my second
Nightingales Ridge
02:34:42 𔓘 Issy
I dreamed I was having a boy
Stormsong Manor
02:34:13 Ven
I actually knew quite early on, around 12 weeks, but it wasn't a definite because he was still small on the scan. But there was a definite peener there too
Nightingales Ridge
02:34:06 𔓘 Issy
We found out at 20 weeks too. There he was plain as day 3 legs splayed out... lol
Guinness Hollow
02:33:53 Dimmed | RID
Absolutely a blessing Issy 🥰 thank you. Both my boys are massive blessings
Nightingales Ridge
02:33:00 𔓘 Issy
Dimmed I will be thinking of you <3 what a little blessing you carry
Guinness Hollow
02:32:54 Dimmed | RID
LOL Ven that's amazing. We couldn't wait tha long and did an early at home gender test
Stormsong Manor
02:31:47 Ven
Our gender reveal party was a quick text to a family group chat that he had a peener at my 20 week scan
Guinness Hollow
02:31:13 Dimmed | RID
Me too, Issy 🥰 that's the most important for us. I've had a lot of anxiety this pregnancy though so praying it continues to go smoothly
Nightingales Ridge
02:30:03 𔓘 Issy
Interesting. Each to their own. I'm happy you have 2 healthy babies <3
Nordahl
02:29:54 Athena | RID/KNN
But to be fair I also dont think I'll ever have kids as I dont feel being a mom is my calling

You must be a registered member for more
than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.






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Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1 

   Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 07:25 PM


Rivendell Steeds
 
Posts: 1207
#980572
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Okay, so I got bored a few weeks ago, and decided to start writing a novel in my boredom. I've -technically- written a first chapter, besides this short introduction, but I honestly think I lost my imagination for it. I won't be posting that here (yet), however, here is the introduction. Let me know what you think!

I'm basically going to treat this forum as a wiki for this novel, and a place for suggestions on it. If you have any name ideas, let me know!

Pronuciation help:
Yilyviad - (Yee-Leh-vee-add)
Leolwin - (Lee-OH-L-w-ih-n)
Plyth - (Pl-eye-th)
Mythius - (M-ih-th-EE-us)
Ryenni - (R-ee-eh-nee)
Zykria - (Z-ih-cr-ee-a)
Octrey - (Awe-c-tree)


- Introduction -
The roaring winds sweep past as we go. The fearsome cries of the nearby fractures surround the cove. As the waves crash against the rough edges of the cliffs, so do the other riders. It’s just us. Us, against the swarms of the hideous beasts we call fractures. It always makes me sad to think these creatures were once leolwins.

A long time ago, we elves weren’t the only life-bringing creatures in Yilyviad, there were also leolwins. These magical beasts were giant, and beautiful. With wings like dragons, and the body of a canine, they ruled fairly over all other creatures. We lived in harmony with these creatures, but in the end, it was us who destroyed them.

Throughout history, elves were known to be fearsome warriors, and great allies, but that all changed when the plyths came along. The plyths were a form of corrupted elves that had been tortured and left for dead. Their hatred for our kind grew so much that they would cut their own ears off to not look like us. Soon enough, they sought to destroy the thing we valued above all.

On the day we call “The Accident to Change it All”, my youngest brother Mythius let in a plyth child. She told him her name was Ryenni, and that her ears had been injured in an encounter with a griffin. He led her directly to the heart of Zykria, looking to get her into a temporary home. It was then when she made her move. Using a concealed staff, she knocked out Mythius, and set a beacon for the plyth warriors to teleport to.

One by one, the leolwins were infected by the spells used on them, and all but a few were turned into ravengeous monsters. Many surviving leolwins fled to the upper regions of Octrey, to live in hiding. The rest coincide with us elves, helping fight against the plyths. Some are used as mounts in battles, others as decoys.

Extra Info:
Setting - This story takes place in 3026, in the far future. Humanity resorted to war, and ended up destroying most of Earth in WWIV. The elves stayed in hiding throughout the reign of the humans, but emerged to end the destruction and violence they caused. Most of humanity has died off, and all that remains of the humans are the half-elves; the result of the cross-breeding of humans and elves. Since the elves came into power in 2079, all magical creatures were able to return to thrive on Earth.

Inspirations - Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, The Unwanteds, Nier: Automata, and many, many more fantasy/equine novels.

Things to Note - This is a WIP. Not the finished, or even halfway done product. Also, this isn't a fanfic. Ideas may have aspects that other novels share, like magic, mythical beasts, etc. but no main ideas are ripped off/stolen.

What do you think I should add to this novel? Should I continue writing it? Feedback is well appreciated!

Edited at April 15, 2022 07:30 PM by Rivendell Steeds
Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 09:26 PM


FirstLightFarms

Trivia Team
 
Posts: 4041
#980598
Give Award
Very cool concept! I'd be intrigued in where you go with it :)

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