Horse Eden Eventing Game
Horse Eden Eventing Game


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Wild_Potatoes
01:20:40 
-HEE Click-
-HEE Click-
Would be such a interesting color combo
Nightingales Ridge
01:20:14 
I like her masquerade mask haha
Wild_Potatoes
01:05:52 
-HEE Click- Ok weirdest color ever
Golden Crest
01:03:24 | Eve
Thank you too! <3
Wild_Potatoes
01:02:52 
Tysm for the treats!
Golden Crest
01:01:29 | Eve
"Falling Fry crunches the treat then nuzzles you for more"
Wild_Potatoes
12:59:18 
-HEE Click-
Same rating as my heart horse mare aka his momma 😭
MC Ace
12:55:30 McFossil
Nice
Wild_Potatoes
12:54:26 
-HEE Click-
Here’s how she rated guys!
MakeEm Fancy
12:42:34 Ally 💜
Hmmm a brindle
-HEE Click-
Glacier Bay Cove
12:35:41 Arctic Katz
Can't wait to see what my mares produce next RO
Glacier Bay Cove
12:35:15 Arctic Katz
Cool
Wild_Potatoes
12:34:57 
-HEE Click-
Here’s what he looks like all grown up
Glacier Bay Cove
12:34:36 Arctic Katz
Nice
Wild_Potatoes
12:33:24 
-HEE Click-
I’m crying-
My special heart horse mare in this game threw me her twin as her final foal
Glacier Bay Cove
12:33:21 Arctic Katz
For me
Glacier Bay Cove
12:33:13 Arctic Katz
What are the odds of getting another pasture, by next RO
Lucky Ranch
12:31:20 luhckeigh
Potatoes
Probably not going to be www but you never know! Good luck!
MakeEm Fancy
12:31:05 Ally 💜
Thank you :)
Golden Crest
12:31:04 | Eve
She’s cute, Ally!

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Wild_Potatoes
01:20:40 
-HEE Click-
-HEE Click-
Would be such a interesting color combo
Nightingales Ridge
01:20:14 
I like her masquerade mask haha
Wild_Potatoes
01:05:52 
-HEE Click- Ok weirdest color ever
Golden Crest
01:03:24 | Eve
Thank you too! <3
Wild_Potatoes
01:02:52 
Tysm for the treats!
Golden Crest
01:01:29 | Eve
"Falling Fry crunches the treat then nuzzles you for more"
Wild_Potatoes
12:59:18 
-HEE Click-
Same rating as my heart horse mare aka his momma 😭
MC Ace
12:55:30 McFossil
Nice
Wild_Potatoes
12:54:26 
-HEE Click-
Here’s how she rated guys!
MakeEm Fancy
12:42:34 Ally 💜
Hmmm a brindle
-HEE Click-
Glacier Bay Cove
12:35:41 Arctic Katz
Can't wait to see what my mares produce next RO
Glacier Bay Cove
12:35:15 Arctic Katz
Cool
Wild_Potatoes
12:34:57 
-HEE Click-
Here’s what he looks like all grown up
Glacier Bay Cove
12:34:36 Arctic Katz
Nice
Wild_Potatoes
12:33:24 
-HEE Click-
I’m crying-
My special heart horse mare in this game threw me her twin as her final foal
Glacier Bay Cove
12:33:21 Arctic Katz
For me
Glacier Bay Cove
12:33:13 Arctic Katz
What are the odds of getting another pasture, by next RO
Lucky Ranch
12:31:20 luhckeigh
Potatoes
Probably not going to be www but you never know! Good luck!
MakeEm Fancy
12:31:05 Ally 💜
Thank you :)
Golden Crest
12:31:04 | Eve
She’s cute, Ally!

You must be a registered member for more
than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.






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Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1 

   Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 07:25 PM


Rivendell Steeds
 
Posts: 1207
#980572
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Okay, so I got bored a few weeks ago, and decided to start writing a novel in my boredom. I've -technically- written a first chapter, besides this short introduction, but I honestly think I lost my imagination for it. I won't be posting that here (yet), however, here is the introduction. Let me know what you think!

I'm basically going to treat this forum as a wiki for this novel, and a place for suggestions on it. If you have any name ideas, let me know!

Pronuciation help:
Yilyviad - (Yee-Leh-vee-add)
Leolwin - (Lee-OH-L-w-ih-n)
Plyth - (Pl-eye-th)
Mythius - (M-ih-th-EE-us)
Ryenni - (R-ee-eh-nee)
Zykria - (Z-ih-cr-ee-a)
Octrey - (Awe-c-tree)


- Introduction -
The roaring winds sweep past as we go. The fearsome cries of the nearby fractures surround the cove. As the waves crash against the rough edges of the cliffs, so do the other riders. It’s just us. Us, against the swarms of the hideous beasts we call fractures. It always makes me sad to think these creatures were once leolwins.

A long time ago, we elves weren’t the only life-bringing creatures in Yilyviad, there were also leolwins. These magical beasts were giant, and beautiful. With wings like dragons, and the body of a canine, they ruled fairly over all other creatures. We lived in harmony with these creatures, but in the end, it was us who destroyed them.

Throughout history, elves were known to be fearsome warriors, and great allies, but that all changed when the plyths came along. The plyths were a form of corrupted elves that had been tortured and left for dead. Their hatred for our kind grew so much that they would cut their own ears off to not look like us. Soon enough, they sought to destroy the thing we valued above all.

On the day we call “The Accident to Change it All”, my youngest brother Mythius let in a plyth child. She told him her name was Ryenni, and that her ears had been injured in an encounter with a griffin. He led her directly to the heart of Zykria, looking to get her into a temporary home. It was then when she made her move. Using a concealed staff, she knocked out Mythius, and set a beacon for the plyth warriors to teleport to.

One by one, the leolwins were infected by the spells used on them, and all but a few were turned into ravengeous monsters. Many surviving leolwins fled to the upper regions of Octrey, to live in hiding. The rest coincide with us elves, helping fight against the plyths. Some are used as mounts in battles, others as decoys.

Extra Info:
Setting - This story takes place in 3026, in the far future. Humanity resorted to war, and ended up destroying most of Earth in WWIV. The elves stayed in hiding throughout the reign of the humans, but emerged to end the destruction and violence they caused. Most of humanity has died off, and all that remains of the humans are the half-elves; the result of the cross-breeding of humans and elves. Since the elves came into power in 2079, all magical creatures were able to return to thrive on Earth.

Inspirations - Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, The Unwanteds, Nier: Automata, and many, many more fantasy/equine novels.

Things to Note - This is a WIP. Not the finished, or even halfway done product. Also, this isn't a fanfic. Ideas may have aspects that other novels share, like magic, mythical beasts, etc. but no main ideas are ripped off/stolen.

What do you think I should add to this novel? Should I continue writing it? Feedback is well appreciated!

Edited at April 15, 2022 07:30 PM by Rivendell Steeds
Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 09:26 PM


FirstLightFarms

Trivia Team
 
Posts: 3834
#980598
Give Award
Very cool concept! I'd be intrigued in where you go with it :)

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