Horse Eden Eventing Game
Horse Eden Eventing Game


Year: 197   Season: Summer   
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Full Stride Farm
06:22:34 Buckeye!
She is not 60 real life days old yet, so she has some more days to grow into her full height
Elysian Meadows
06:20:01 
I don’t understand… she’s 14 hands but a sport horse? XD -HEE Click-
Ranch Lands Training
06:13:24 Lilly/PON Addict
It's currently -28 but feels like -40. By Monday it will be 5 above and sunny
Ranch Lands Training
06:10:39 Lilly/PON Addict
Ugh, our water pipe froze again. Can't even make a coffee :/
SwankPony
06:03:26 Swanky
I'm nervous for her wk7, we will have to see!
Mythological
05:59:18 Crowley | Krampus
Why her?
-HEE Click-
Minerva
05:57:06 Min
Oh thats true actually Swanky! Maybe she said a fat no to the bravery because she's going to have epic training- fingers crossed anyway lol
Mythological
05:55:57 Crowley | Krampus
lol
SwankPony
05:55:45 Swanky
We will have to see how Hyperblush does on her wk7, so managed to go all up wk4.
Minerva
05:54:44 Min
Nah gotta keep the dwarves together! The boys have been relegated to yolo matches to try and bring my overall height down now though rather than actual effort. Bash will still go for stud I think as you never know!
Mythological
05:54:10 Crowley | Krampus
ooh Doc is sexy
Ranch Lands Training
05:54:03 Lilly/PON Addict
Thanks Min! Smonkey black x White gave me one first try
Mythological
05:53:08 Crowley | Krampus
Min
He has a home here lol
Minerva
05:51:06 Min
Oh nooo Myth! Bash hasn't managed anything impressive so far unfortunately 😬 Capture gods definitely said quantity over quality for me haha!
Mythological
05:50:20 Crowley | Krampus
Min
The WEE foal your WWW-E gave me flopped for trianing lol
Minerva
05:49:57 Min
Fingers crossed lol!

Lilly just breed white with normal PPPs- you usually get one pretty quickly
Thunderbolt Park
05:48:33 Bolt
Sorry I'm kind of ragging my boyfriend's in hospital in a coma
Thunderbolt Park
05:47:23 Bolt
I breed 2 really good horses and only got a EEE
Ranch Lands Training
05:46:16 Lilly/PON Addict
Well I'm going to skip the "Breed a PP white foal". That doesn't sound productive
Thunderbolt Park
05:46:16 Bolt
I now want to dieeeeeeeeeeeee

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Horse Eden Eventing Game
Chatbox
Full Stride Farm
06:22:34 Buckeye!
She is not 60 real life days old yet, so she has some more days to grow into her full height
Elysian Meadows
06:20:01 
I don’t understand… she’s 14 hands but a sport horse? XD -HEE Click-
Ranch Lands Training
06:13:24 Lilly/PON Addict
It's currently -28 but feels like -40. By Monday it will be 5 above and sunny
Ranch Lands Training
06:10:39 Lilly/PON Addict
Ugh, our water pipe froze again. Can't even make a coffee :/
SwankPony
06:03:26 Swanky
I'm nervous for her wk7, we will have to see!
Mythological
05:59:18 Crowley | Krampus
Why her?
-HEE Click-
Minerva
05:57:06 Min
Oh thats true actually Swanky! Maybe she said a fat no to the bravery because she's going to have epic training- fingers crossed anyway lol
Mythological
05:55:57 Crowley | Krampus
lol
SwankPony
05:55:45 Swanky
We will have to see how Hyperblush does on her wk7, so managed to go all up wk4.
Minerva
05:54:44 Min
Nah gotta keep the dwarves together! The boys have been relegated to yolo matches to try and bring my overall height down now though rather than actual effort. Bash will still go for stud I think as you never know!
Mythological
05:54:10 Crowley | Krampus
ooh Doc is sexy
Ranch Lands Training
05:54:03 Lilly/PON Addict
Thanks Min! Smonkey black x White gave me one first try
Mythological
05:53:08 Crowley | Krampus
Min
He has a home here lol
Minerva
05:51:06 Min
Oh nooo Myth! Bash hasn't managed anything impressive so far unfortunately 😬 Capture gods definitely said quantity over quality for me haha!
Mythological
05:50:20 Crowley | Krampus
Min
The WEE foal your WWW-E gave me flopped for trianing lol
Minerva
05:49:57 Min
Fingers crossed lol!

Lilly just breed white with normal PPPs- you usually get one pretty quickly
Thunderbolt Park
05:48:33 Bolt
Sorry I'm kind of ragging my boyfriend's in hospital in a coma
Thunderbolt Park
05:47:23 Bolt
I breed 2 really good horses and only got a EEE
Ranch Lands Training
05:46:16 Lilly/PON Addict
Well I'm going to skip the "Breed a PP white foal". That doesn't sound productive
Thunderbolt Park
05:46:16 Bolt
I now want to dieeeeeeeeeeeee

You must be a registered member for more
than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.






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Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1 

   Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 07:25 PM


Rivendell Steeds
 
Posts: 1207
#980572
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Okay, so I got bored a few weeks ago, and decided to start writing a novel in my boredom. I've -technically- written a first chapter, besides this short introduction, but I honestly think I lost my imagination for it. I won't be posting that here (yet), however, here is the introduction. Let me know what you think!

I'm basically going to treat this forum as a wiki for this novel, and a place for suggestions on it. If you have any name ideas, let me know!

Pronuciation help:
Yilyviad - (Yee-Leh-vee-add)
Leolwin - (Lee-OH-L-w-ih-n)
Plyth - (Pl-eye-th)
Mythius - (M-ih-th-EE-us)
Ryenni - (R-ee-eh-nee)
Zykria - (Z-ih-cr-ee-a)
Octrey - (Awe-c-tree)


- Introduction -
The roaring winds sweep past as we go. The fearsome cries of the nearby fractures surround the cove. As the waves crash against the rough edges of the cliffs, so do the other riders. It’s just us. Us, against the swarms of the hideous beasts we call fractures. It always makes me sad to think these creatures were once leolwins.

A long time ago, we elves weren’t the only life-bringing creatures in Yilyviad, there were also leolwins. These magical beasts were giant, and beautiful. With wings like dragons, and the body of a canine, they ruled fairly over all other creatures. We lived in harmony with these creatures, but in the end, it was us who destroyed them.

Throughout history, elves were known to be fearsome warriors, and great allies, but that all changed when the plyths came along. The plyths were a form of corrupted elves that had been tortured and left for dead. Their hatred for our kind grew so much that they would cut their own ears off to not look like us. Soon enough, they sought to destroy the thing we valued above all.

On the day we call “The Accident to Change it All”, my youngest brother Mythius let in a plyth child. She told him her name was Ryenni, and that her ears had been injured in an encounter with a griffin. He led her directly to the heart of Zykria, looking to get her into a temporary home. It was then when she made her move. Using a concealed staff, she knocked out Mythius, and set a beacon for the plyth warriors to teleport to.

One by one, the leolwins were infected by the spells used on them, and all but a few were turned into ravengeous monsters. Many surviving leolwins fled to the upper regions of Octrey, to live in hiding. The rest coincide with us elves, helping fight against the plyths. Some are used as mounts in battles, others as decoys.

Extra Info:
Setting - This story takes place in 3026, in the far future. Humanity resorted to war, and ended up destroying most of Earth in WWIV. The elves stayed in hiding throughout the reign of the humans, but emerged to end the destruction and violence they caused. Most of humanity has died off, and all that remains of the humans are the half-elves; the result of the cross-breeding of humans and elves. Since the elves came into power in 2079, all magical creatures were able to return to thrive on Earth.

Inspirations - Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, The Unwanteds, Nier: Automata, and many, many more fantasy/equine novels.

Things to Note - This is a WIP. Not the finished, or even halfway done product. Also, this isn't a fanfic. Ideas may have aspects that other novels share, like magic, mythical beasts, etc. but no main ideas are ripped off/stolen.

What do you think I should add to this novel? Should I continue writing it? Feedback is well appreciated!

Edited at April 15, 2022 07:30 PM by Rivendell Steeds
Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 09:26 PM


FirstLightFarms

Trivia Team
 
Posts: 3984
#980598
Give Award
Very cool concept! I'd be intrigued in where you go with it :)

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