Horse Eden Eventing Game
Horse Eden Eventing Game


Year: 197   Season: Summer   
$: 0
Forecast: Sunny And Hot
Forecast:
Sun 10:52pm  
Stables Online:  80 
Chatbox
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:52:18 Snurblet/Snurb
anomynous
not yet. it will be mine.
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:52:08 Snurblet/Snurb
why the helly did my foal not get sold i swear someone bid on it
Dance In The Field
10:51:01 Anonymous donor
Snurbs, so you got that foal?
BlackRose
10:50:42 Stella
I love noodles & your friend requests etc are in your mail. They’ll appear in the “game” section of your Mail.
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:50:41 Snurblet/Snurb
something moved again in my room
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:50:24 Snurblet/Snurb
guys…
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:50:10 Snurblet/Snurb
ill name the sable patterned buldak carbonara
BlackRose
10:50:04 Stella
Blaze - he’s gonna get a block of cheese launched at him if he carries on xD
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:49:58 Snurblet/Snurb
i really want buldak noodles.
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:49:49 Snurblet/Snurb
Anomynous
thank you!
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:49:35 Snurblet/Snurb
Stella
oh my god i was just thinking about that happening with one of my fav horses luckily didnt happen yet
Twin Flames
10:49:31 Blaze
HAHA the cheese 😭
Dance In The Field
10:49:18 Anonymous donor
Snurbs, I think in activities?
BlackRose
10:48:59 Stella
I’ve just set free a horse I wanted to keep but I wasn’t paying attention ohhhh my days
BlackRose
10:48:34 Stella
Mine likes to make forehead jokes at me lmao - he’s not gonna be laughing when I slap a slice of cheese directly on his own forehead the little pigeon.
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:48:22 Snurblet/Snurb
How do i see friend requests i have a few i think
Twin Flames
10:47:31 Blaze
Lmaooooo
I love annoying my other half and for literally no good reason. He hasn't had enough *yet* and it's been 12 years 🙃
Glacier Bay Cove
10:47:23 Glacier Kittens
Maybe, hopefully
BlackRose
10:46:41 Stella
Glacier - I’m sure you’ll smash the Christmas trivia
Glacier Bay Cove
10:46:15 Glacier Kittens
Wishing I had done better in trivia tonight

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Snurbs Sport Horses
10:52:18 Snurblet/Snurb
anomynous
not yet. it will be mine.
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:52:08 Snurblet/Snurb
why the helly did my foal not get sold i swear someone bid on it
Dance In The Field
10:51:01 Anonymous donor
Snurbs, so you got that foal?
BlackRose
10:50:42 Stella
I love noodles & your friend requests etc are in your mail. They’ll appear in the “game” section of your Mail.
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:50:41 Snurblet/Snurb
something moved again in my room
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:50:24 Snurblet/Snurb
guys…
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:50:10 Snurblet/Snurb
ill name the sable patterned buldak carbonara
BlackRose
10:50:04 Stella
Blaze - he’s gonna get a block of cheese launched at him if he carries on xD
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:49:58 Snurblet/Snurb
i really want buldak noodles.
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:49:49 Snurblet/Snurb
Anomynous
thank you!
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:49:35 Snurblet/Snurb
Stella
oh my god i was just thinking about that happening with one of my fav horses luckily didnt happen yet
Twin Flames
10:49:31 Blaze
HAHA the cheese 😭
Dance In The Field
10:49:18 Anonymous donor
Snurbs, I think in activities?
BlackRose
10:48:59 Stella
I’ve just set free a horse I wanted to keep but I wasn’t paying attention ohhhh my days
BlackRose
10:48:34 Stella
Mine likes to make forehead jokes at me lmao - he’s not gonna be laughing when I slap a slice of cheese directly on his own forehead the little pigeon.
Snurbs Sport Horses
10:48:22 Snurblet/Snurb
How do i see friend requests i have a few i think
Twin Flames
10:47:31 Blaze
Lmaooooo
I love annoying my other half and for literally no good reason. He hasn't had enough *yet* and it's been 12 years 🙃
Glacier Bay Cove
10:47:23 Glacier Kittens
Maybe, hopefully
BlackRose
10:46:41 Stella
Glacier - I’m sure you’ll smash the Christmas trivia
Glacier Bay Cove
10:46:15 Glacier Kittens
Wishing I had done better in trivia tonight

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than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.






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Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1 

   Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 07:25 PM


Rivendell Steeds
 
Posts: 1207
#980572
Give Award
Okay, so I got bored a few weeks ago, and decided to start writing a novel in my boredom. I've -technically- written a first chapter, besides this short introduction, but I honestly think I lost my imagination for it. I won't be posting that here (yet), however, here is the introduction. Let me know what you think!

I'm basically going to treat this forum as a wiki for this novel, and a place for suggestions on it. If you have any name ideas, let me know!

Pronuciation help:
Yilyviad - (Yee-Leh-vee-add)
Leolwin - (Lee-OH-L-w-ih-n)
Plyth - (Pl-eye-th)
Mythius - (M-ih-th-EE-us)
Ryenni - (R-ee-eh-nee)
Zykria - (Z-ih-cr-ee-a)
Octrey - (Awe-c-tree)


- Introduction -
The roaring winds sweep past as we go. The fearsome cries of the nearby fractures surround the cove. As the waves crash against the rough edges of the cliffs, so do the other riders. It’s just us. Us, against the swarms of the hideous beasts we call fractures. It always makes me sad to think these creatures were once leolwins.

A long time ago, we elves weren’t the only life-bringing creatures in Yilyviad, there were also leolwins. These magical beasts were giant, and beautiful. With wings like dragons, and the body of a canine, they ruled fairly over all other creatures. We lived in harmony with these creatures, but in the end, it was us who destroyed them.

Throughout history, elves were known to be fearsome warriors, and great allies, but that all changed when the plyths came along. The plyths were a form of corrupted elves that had been tortured and left for dead. Their hatred for our kind grew so much that they would cut their own ears off to not look like us. Soon enough, they sought to destroy the thing we valued above all.

On the day we call “The Accident to Change it All”, my youngest brother Mythius let in a plyth child. She told him her name was Ryenni, and that her ears had been injured in an encounter with a griffin. He led her directly to the heart of Zykria, looking to get her into a temporary home. It was then when she made her move. Using a concealed staff, she knocked out Mythius, and set a beacon for the plyth warriors to teleport to.

One by one, the leolwins were infected by the spells used on them, and all but a few were turned into ravengeous monsters. Many surviving leolwins fled to the upper regions of Octrey, to live in hiding. The rest coincide with us elves, helping fight against the plyths. Some are used as mounts in battles, others as decoys.

Extra Info:
Setting - This story takes place in 3026, in the far future. Humanity resorted to war, and ended up destroying most of Earth in WWIV. The elves stayed in hiding throughout the reign of the humans, but emerged to end the destruction and violence they caused. Most of humanity has died off, and all that remains of the humans are the half-elves; the result of the cross-breeding of humans and elves. Since the elves came into power in 2079, all magical creatures were able to return to thrive on Earth.

Inspirations - Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, The Unwanteds, Nier: Automata, and many, many more fantasy/equine novels.

Things to Note - This is a WIP. Not the finished, or even halfway done product. Also, this isn't a fanfic. Ideas may have aspects that other novels share, like magic, mythical beasts, etc. but no main ideas are ripped off/stolen.

What do you think I should add to this novel? Should I continue writing it? Feedback is well appreciated!

Edited at April 15, 2022 07:30 PM by Rivendell Steeds
Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 09:26 PM


FirstLightFarms

Trivia Team
 
Posts: 3988
#980598
Give Award
Very cool concept! I'd be intrigued in where you go with it :)

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