Horse Eden Eventing Game
Horse Eden Eventing Game


Year: 197   Season: Spring   
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Mythological
04:01:27 Crowley | Krampus
Hey Daisy
Minerva
04:01:26 Min
Oooh very nice!! I got these, a few WW combo fillies and a crap ton of EEEs lol

-HEE Click-
-HEE Click-

Pleased overall though! Bravery testing is another story- the first 50 have been dogshit
DaisyMeadowEventing
04:01:22 Daisy/ DM♡
Mo
Ok, thank you!
Drafty Acres
04:01:08 Mo
Daisy
Yes
Painted Perfection
04:00:54 Luna
-HEE Click-

OH My GOD what!?!
DaisyMeadowEventing
04:00:38 Daisy/ DM♡
Can this guy produce apricots?
-HEE Click-
The Feral Equine
03:59:36 Khaos
A crap ton of blood work looking for a specific enzyme that is released but when you have a flair you only have like 20 minutes to get to sample
Mythological
03:59:18 Crowley | Krampus
"Didn't do RO..." Got a WWW Blue roan tobaino sabino WB filly...

You?
Minerva
03:58:18 Min
Myth!! How has your RO been?
Mythological
03:58:03 Crowley | Krampus
Hey Min
Minerva
03:56:30 Min
Dulcie- it will definitely catch fire xD Chuck a stone layer at the bottom of the walls and do a stone roof and you should be good to go though
Hummingbird Meadows
03:56:06 Bird
@Khaos, how did you get diagnosed?
The Feral Equine
03:55:28 Khaos
It’s the biggest pain in the butt. And it’s a super dumb cause the biggest histamine trigger for me is stress
The Rushing Isles
03:55:21 TRI
dulce probably
Glacier Bay Cove
03:54:18 Glacier Kittens
Really hoping that it’s not appendicitis
Hummingbird Meadows
03:53:36 Bird
@Khaos, no although I have looked a little into it and my symptoms somewhat align. It sounds REALLY difficult to get a diagnosis for that though.
The Feral Equine
03:53:04 Khaos
Bird - Has anyone mentioned MCAS? That is what I have after being misdiagnosed with IBS and Celiac
Glacier Bay Cove
03:52:43 Glacier Kittens
If I can’t sleep tonight from the pain, I will be going to the hospital tomorrow
Frog Judgment Acers
03:52:29 Dulcie/Crazy
Will my house catch fire 🔥 🔥 ; )
Glacier Bay Cove
03:51:42 Glacier Kittens
There are always people who will do that, that’s why I changed doctors

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Chatbox
Mythological
04:01:27 Crowley | Krampus
Hey Daisy
Minerva
04:01:26 Min
Oooh very nice!! I got these, a few WW combo fillies and a crap ton of EEEs lol

-HEE Click-
-HEE Click-

Pleased overall though! Bravery testing is another story- the first 50 have been dogshit
DaisyMeadowEventing
04:01:22 Daisy/ DM♡
Mo
Ok, thank you!
Drafty Acres
04:01:08 Mo
Daisy
Yes
Painted Perfection
04:00:54 Luna
-HEE Click-

OH My GOD what!?!
DaisyMeadowEventing
04:00:38 Daisy/ DM♡
Can this guy produce apricots?
-HEE Click-
The Feral Equine
03:59:36 Khaos
A crap ton of blood work looking for a specific enzyme that is released but when you have a flair you only have like 20 minutes to get to sample
Mythological
03:59:18 Crowley | Krampus
"Didn't do RO..." Got a WWW Blue roan tobaino sabino WB filly...

You?
Minerva
03:58:18 Min
Myth!! How has your RO been?
Mythological
03:58:03 Crowley | Krampus
Hey Min
Minerva
03:56:30 Min
Dulcie- it will definitely catch fire xD Chuck a stone layer at the bottom of the walls and do a stone roof and you should be good to go though
Hummingbird Meadows
03:56:06 Bird
@Khaos, how did you get diagnosed?
The Feral Equine
03:55:28 Khaos
It’s the biggest pain in the butt. And it’s a super dumb cause the biggest histamine trigger for me is stress
The Rushing Isles
03:55:21 TRI
dulce probably
Glacier Bay Cove
03:54:18 Glacier Kittens
Really hoping that it’s not appendicitis
Hummingbird Meadows
03:53:36 Bird
@Khaos, no although I have looked a little into it and my symptoms somewhat align. It sounds REALLY difficult to get a diagnosis for that though.
The Feral Equine
03:53:04 Khaos
Bird - Has anyone mentioned MCAS? That is what I have after being misdiagnosed with IBS and Celiac
Glacier Bay Cove
03:52:43 Glacier Kittens
If I can’t sleep tonight from the pain, I will be going to the hospital tomorrow
Frog Judgment Acers
03:52:29 Dulcie/Crazy
Will my house catch fire 🔥 🔥 ; )
Glacier Bay Cove
03:51:42 Glacier Kittens
There are always people who will do that, that’s why I changed doctors

You must be a registered member for more
than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.






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Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1 

   Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 07:25 PM


Rivendell Steeds
 
Posts: 1207
#980572
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Okay, so I got bored a few weeks ago, and decided to start writing a novel in my boredom. I've -technically- written a first chapter, besides this short introduction, but I honestly think I lost my imagination for it. I won't be posting that here (yet), however, here is the introduction. Let me know what you think!

I'm basically going to treat this forum as a wiki for this novel, and a place for suggestions on it. If you have any name ideas, let me know!

Pronuciation help:
Yilyviad - (Yee-Leh-vee-add)
Leolwin - (Lee-OH-L-w-ih-n)
Plyth - (Pl-eye-th)
Mythius - (M-ih-th-EE-us)
Ryenni - (R-ee-eh-nee)
Zykria - (Z-ih-cr-ee-a)
Octrey - (Awe-c-tree)


- Introduction -
The roaring winds sweep past as we go. The fearsome cries of the nearby fractures surround the cove. As the waves crash against the rough edges of the cliffs, so do the other riders. It’s just us. Us, against the swarms of the hideous beasts we call fractures. It always makes me sad to think these creatures were once leolwins.

A long time ago, we elves weren’t the only life-bringing creatures in Yilyviad, there were also leolwins. These magical beasts were giant, and beautiful. With wings like dragons, and the body of a canine, they ruled fairly over all other creatures. We lived in harmony with these creatures, but in the end, it was us who destroyed them.

Throughout history, elves were known to be fearsome warriors, and great allies, but that all changed when the plyths came along. The plyths were a form of corrupted elves that had been tortured and left for dead. Their hatred for our kind grew so much that they would cut their own ears off to not look like us. Soon enough, they sought to destroy the thing we valued above all.

On the day we call “The Accident to Change it All”, my youngest brother Mythius let in a plyth child. She told him her name was Ryenni, and that her ears had been injured in an encounter with a griffin. He led her directly to the heart of Zykria, looking to get her into a temporary home. It was then when she made her move. Using a concealed staff, she knocked out Mythius, and set a beacon for the plyth warriors to teleport to.

One by one, the leolwins were infected by the spells used on them, and all but a few were turned into ravengeous monsters. Many surviving leolwins fled to the upper regions of Octrey, to live in hiding. The rest coincide with us elves, helping fight against the plyths. Some are used as mounts in battles, others as decoys.

Extra Info:
Setting - This story takes place in 3026, in the far future. Humanity resorted to war, and ended up destroying most of Earth in WWIV. The elves stayed in hiding throughout the reign of the humans, but emerged to end the destruction and violence they caused. Most of humanity has died off, and all that remains of the humans are the half-elves; the result of the cross-breeding of humans and elves. Since the elves came into power in 2079, all magical creatures were able to return to thrive on Earth.

Inspirations - Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, The Unwanteds, Nier: Automata, and many, many more fantasy/equine novels.

Things to Note - This is a WIP. Not the finished, or even halfway done product. Also, this isn't a fanfic. Ideas may have aspects that other novels share, like magic, mythical beasts, etc. but no main ideas are ripped off/stolen.

What do you think I should add to this novel? Should I continue writing it? Feedback is well appreciated!

Edited at April 15, 2022 07:30 PM by Rivendell Steeds
Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 09:26 PM


FirstLightFarms

Trivia Team
 
Posts: 3978
#980598
Give Award
Very cool concept! I'd be intrigued in where you go with it :)

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