Horse Eden Eventing Game
Horse Eden Eventing Game


Year: 196   Season: Fall   
$: 0
Forecast: Moderate Temperatures and Overcast
Forecast:
Mon 02:39pm  
Stables Online:  136 
Chatbox
Nolified
02:39:37 ♡ Lee Yoon
Grimm,
It's the afternoon for me but it's going good. Got a lot of hateful ponies over here.
Sunset River Arabian
02:39:08 Athena - AAs
what do we think of these for her first embryos?
-HEE Click-
-HEE Click-
Motonemi
02:39:04 AL, mum to Nemi
The Grimmus! <3
Wicca Wilds
02:37:44 Grimm(us)
How's everyone's night?
Sunset River Arabian
02:35:21 Athena - AAs
mildly surprised with so many up but I'll take it
-HEE Click-
Pearlescent Shores
02:28:35 Bin/Bingus
Thank you guys, I'm excited for her now *-*
The Joker
02:25:43 Ari <3
Oh she's cool Bin 👀
Astral Appies
02:23:14 Athena's SA - KNNs
I think it's time to start finding broods here to bring in new blood. My stock keeps getting worse T-T
Motonemi
02:21:57 AL, mum to Nemi
Nice Bin
Pearlescent Shores
02:20:49 Bin/Bingus
Eek that 7!! -HEE Click-
Motonemi
02:20:33 AL, mum to Nemi
I need to remember which mare I was to borrow first (Total brain fog)
Morning Glory Farms
02:19:21 Terici/Dino/Trish
You can always have straws if you want Al
Motonemi
02:17:50 AL, mum to Nemi
I had one going but pearl got bred out of my RIDs *sigh*
The Joker
02:16:45 Ari <3
It'll be super cool to see what comes of your program, not that having a WWW apricot RID in game isn't cool but it's neat to see them come from an actual program :3
Motonemi
02:15:20 AL, mum to Nemi
Might dig around and see if I have something that matches him
Motonemi
02:14:15 AL, mum to Nemi
Aahh, he's related to my old crew of brats
The Joker
02:13:31 Ari <3
Ooo pretty
Morning Glory Farms
02:13:14 Terici/Dino/Trish
-HEE Click- I bought this boy off of capp Al
Motonemi
02:13:08 AL, mum to Nemi
Ah, ignore me
Morning Glory Farms
02:12:27 Terici/Dino/Trish
Thats the one that got changed because of the pumpkin contest

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Chatbox
Nolified
02:39:37 ♡ Lee Yoon
Grimm,
It's the afternoon for me but it's going good. Got a lot of hateful ponies over here.
Sunset River Arabian
02:39:08 Athena - AAs
what do we think of these for her first embryos?
-HEE Click-
-HEE Click-
Motonemi
02:39:04 AL, mum to Nemi
The Grimmus! <3
Wicca Wilds
02:37:44 Grimm(us)
How's everyone's night?
Sunset River Arabian
02:35:21 Athena - AAs
mildly surprised with so many up but I'll take it
-HEE Click-
Pearlescent Shores
02:28:35 Bin/Bingus
Thank you guys, I'm excited for her now *-*
The Joker
02:25:43 Ari <3
Oh she's cool Bin 👀
Astral Appies
02:23:14 Athena's SA - KNNs
I think it's time to start finding broods here to bring in new blood. My stock keeps getting worse T-T
Motonemi
02:21:57 AL, mum to Nemi
Nice Bin
Pearlescent Shores
02:20:49 Bin/Bingus
Eek that 7!! -HEE Click-
Motonemi
02:20:33 AL, mum to Nemi
I need to remember which mare I was to borrow first (Total brain fog)
Morning Glory Farms
02:19:21 Terici/Dino/Trish
You can always have straws if you want Al
Motonemi
02:17:50 AL, mum to Nemi
I had one going but pearl got bred out of my RIDs *sigh*
The Joker
02:16:45 Ari <3
It'll be super cool to see what comes of your program, not that having a WWW apricot RID in game isn't cool but it's neat to see them come from an actual program :3
Motonemi
02:15:20 AL, mum to Nemi
Might dig around and see if I have something that matches him
Motonemi
02:14:15 AL, mum to Nemi
Aahh, he's related to my old crew of brats
The Joker
02:13:31 Ari <3
Ooo pretty
Morning Glory Farms
02:13:14 Terici/Dino/Trish
-HEE Click- I bought this boy off of capp Al
Motonemi
02:13:08 AL, mum to Nemi
Ah, ignore me
Morning Glory Farms
02:12:27 Terici/Dino/Trish
Thats the one that got changed because of the pumpkin contest

You must be a registered member for more
than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.






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Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1 

   Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 07:25 PM


Rivendell Steeds
 
Posts: 1207
#980572
Give Award
Okay, so I got bored a few weeks ago, and decided to start writing a novel in my boredom. I've -technically- written a first chapter, besides this short introduction, but I honestly think I lost my imagination for it. I won't be posting that here (yet), however, here is the introduction. Let me know what you think!

I'm basically going to treat this forum as a wiki for this novel, and a place for suggestions on it. If you have any name ideas, let me know!

Pronuciation help:
Yilyviad - (Yee-Leh-vee-add)
Leolwin - (Lee-OH-L-w-ih-n)
Plyth - (Pl-eye-th)
Mythius - (M-ih-th-EE-us)
Ryenni - (R-ee-eh-nee)
Zykria - (Z-ih-cr-ee-a)
Octrey - (Awe-c-tree)


- Introduction -
The roaring winds sweep past as we go. The fearsome cries of the nearby fractures surround the cove. As the waves crash against the rough edges of the cliffs, so do the other riders. It’s just us. Us, against the swarms of the hideous beasts we call fractures. It always makes me sad to think these creatures were once leolwins.

A long time ago, we elves weren’t the only life-bringing creatures in Yilyviad, there were also leolwins. These magical beasts were giant, and beautiful. With wings like dragons, and the body of a canine, they ruled fairly over all other creatures. We lived in harmony with these creatures, but in the end, it was us who destroyed them.

Throughout history, elves were known to be fearsome warriors, and great allies, but that all changed when the plyths came along. The plyths were a form of corrupted elves that had been tortured and left for dead. Their hatred for our kind grew so much that they would cut their own ears off to not look like us. Soon enough, they sought to destroy the thing we valued above all.

On the day we call “The Accident to Change it All”, my youngest brother Mythius let in a plyth child. She told him her name was Ryenni, and that her ears had been injured in an encounter with a griffin. He led her directly to the heart of Zykria, looking to get her into a temporary home. It was then when she made her move. Using a concealed staff, she knocked out Mythius, and set a beacon for the plyth warriors to teleport to.

One by one, the leolwins were infected by the spells used on them, and all but a few were turned into ravengeous monsters. Many surviving leolwins fled to the upper regions of Octrey, to live in hiding. The rest coincide with us elves, helping fight against the plyths. Some are used as mounts in battles, others as decoys.

Extra Info:
Setting - This story takes place in 3026, in the far future. Humanity resorted to war, and ended up destroying most of Earth in WWIV. The elves stayed in hiding throughout the reign of the humans, but emerged to end the destruction and violence they caused. Most of humanity has died off, and all that remains of the humans are the half-elves; the result of the cross-breeding of humans and elves. Since the elves came into power in 2079, all magical creatures were able to return to thrive on Earth.

Inspirations - Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, The Unwanteds, Nier: Automata, and many, many more fantasy/equine novels.

Things to Note - This is a WIP. Not the finished, or even halfway done product. Also, this isn't a fanfic. Ideas may have aspects that other novels share, like magic, mythical beasts, etc. but no main ideas are ripped off/stolen.

What do you think I should add to this novel? Should I continue writing it? Feedback is well appreciated!

Edited at April 15, 2022 07:30 PM by Rivendell Steeds
Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 09:26 PM


FirstLightFarms

Trivia Team
 
Posts: 3966
#980598
Give Award
Very cool concept! I'd be intrigued in where you go with it :)

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