Horse Eden Eventing Game
Horse Eden Eventing Game


Year: 201   Season: Winter   
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Forecast: Sunshine with a Solar Eclipse
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Stables Online:  142 
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Whispering Pine Stab
01:36:02 Hailey
Do you like him?
Whispering Pine Stab
01:34:49 Hailey
Hate ratings but the color!
-HEE Click-
Nolified
01:28:53 Miren
My bad, I need help with looking for geldings, I'm not that great with telling if it's show ready. 🤦‍♀️
Glacier Bay Cove
01:27:49 Glacier Kittens
Having terrible luck in the barn cats mini game
Magpie Ridge
01:26:20 Ven | RID
That's not very descriptive. We have a Help Me feature and a Help section of the forum
Nolified
01:22:41 Miren
I could use an extra hand with something, PM me please.
RockyMountainMyth
01:16:57 Mari ♥
Ryn- I hope you never experience those kinds of migraines. I get about 2 per week and DAMN are they inconvenient
ryn - RIDs
01:14:48 sxdisticsoul ♱
Mari,
No I've thankfully never had the aura things but I've heard they're an absolute pain! My doctor had me on elavil to relieve my headaches but took me off of it. It's not super bad right now but it definitely hurts, I always get sick when I have a migraine and I already feel queasy. Thank you tho!
RockyMountainMyth
01:12:08 Mari ♥
Ryn- I feel ya. I get chronic migraines. Do you get the auras/the kind that make you blind too? The ones that get me the worst are scent triggered that make me lose my vision and leave me hugging the toilet haha. Good luck!
ryn - RIDs
01:09:29 sxdisticsoul ♱
i have such a bad migraine, im so ready to go home
Angels angels
01:06:51 [1k+ brindles] Angel
I know lol. I guess because normally even the standards only weigh like 50-60lbs because they are so lean but no they are large dogs lol
Greenheart Stables
01:00:30 Gren|Grenlin|Snek
@Angel
Most doodles could be mistaken as a horse lol
Nolified
12:59:46 Miren
I have two straws that I bought several months ago but I forgot I even had them.. This is why you always check what you have every once and a while. 🤦‍♀️
Angels angels
12:55:42 [1k+ brindles] Angel
I don't understand how people say their standard golden doodle is a medium sized dog 🤦‍♀️
Shady Tree Farm
12:39:57 Shady
Ah duh. Thank you 🤦‍♀️ At some point I need to get better at reading the base colors off of gene tests lol
Whitewolf
12:39:46 Fang
Love it when it’s a day of endless calls. It’s all good til you start shaking from not eating :p
Riverchase Castle
12:38:50 RC
Shady she is cremello
Moonrose Magic
12:36:31 🎀 Diva
I'm quite busy with job, but anyone that can make that idea happen - go for it
Shady Tree Farm
12:35:40 Shady
Ok, somebody who's better at gene tests than me... What is she? xD Homo creme, but no pearl... So not smoky black I assume. Just creme?
-HEE Click-
Hallucination Manor
12:34:09 Gym / HM / Hal
Oh nice, Ven!!

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Whispering Pine Stab
01:36:02 Hailey
Do you like him?
Whispering Pine Stab
01:34:49 Hailey
Hate ratings but the color!
-HEE Click-
Nolified
01:28:53 Miren
My bad, I need help with looking for geldings, I'm not that great with telling if it's show ready. 🤦‍♀️
Glacier Bay Cove
01:27:49 Glacier Kittens
Having terrible luck in the barn cats mini game
Magpie Ridge
01:26:20 Ven | RID
That's not very descriptive. We have a Help Me feature and a Help section of the forum
Nolified
01:22:41 Miren
I could use an extra hand with something, PM me please.
RockyMountainMyth
01:16:57 Mari ♥
Ryn- I hope you never experience those kinds of migraines. I get about 2 per week and DAMN are they inconvenient
ryn - RIDs
01:14:48 sxdisticsoul ♱
Mari,
No I've thankfully never had the aura things but I've heard they're an absolute pain! My doctor had me on elavil to relieve my headaches but took me off of it. It's not super bad right now but it definitely hurts, I always get sick when I have a migraine and I already feel queasy. Thank you tho!
RockyMountainMyth
01:12:08 Mari ♥
Ryn- I feel ya. I get chronic migraines. Do you get the auras/the kind that make you blind too? The ones that get me the worst are scent triggered that make me lose my vision and leave me hugging the toilet haha. Good luck!
ryn - RIDs
01:09:29 sxdisticsoul ♱
i have such a bad migraine, im so ready to go home
Angels angels
01:06:51 [1k+ brindles] Angel
I know lol. I guess because normally even the standards only weigh like 50-60lbs because they are so lean but no they are large dogs lol
Greenheart Stables
01:00:30 Gren|Grenlin|Snek
@Angel
Most doodles could be mistaken as a horse lol
Nolified
12:59:46 Miren
I have two straws that I bought several months ago but I forgot I even had them.. This is why you always check what you have every once and a while. 🤦‍♀️
Angels angels
12:55:42 [1k+ brindles] Angel
I don't understand how people say their standard golden doodle is a medium sized dog 🤦‍♀️
Shady Tree Farm
12:39:57 Shady
Ah duh. Thank you 🤦‍♀️ At some point I need to get better at reading the base colors off of gene tests lol
Whitewolf
12:39:46 Fang
Love it when it’s a day of endless calls. It’s all good til you start shaking from not eating :p
Riverchase Castle
12:38:50 RC
Shady she is cremello
Moonrose Magic
12:36:31 🎀 Diva
I'm quite busy with job, but anyone that can make that idea happen - go for it
Shady Tree Farm
12:35:40 Shady
Ok, somebody who's better at gene tests than me... What is she? xD Homo creme, but no pearl... So not smoky black I assume. Just creme?
-HEE Click-
Hallucination Manor
12:34:09 Gym / HM / Hal
Oh nice, Ven!!

You must be a registered member for more
than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.






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Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1 

Im writing a story (Most likely trash) December 19, 2020 08:38 PM

Former Stable
 
Posts: 0
#826002
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This story is about a 12-year-old human-animal hybrid (called an Animorphi) named Auburn, her roommates, and an evil force planning to destroy the human population and let the Animorph rise to greatness. Here's the document, for those who wish to read:
(I changed the settings, it should work)
Any ideas? Comments? Constructive criticism?
PLEASE don't edit the document, leave comments instead!
Im writing a story (Most likely trash) December 20, 2020 02:34 PM

Former Stable
 
Posts: 0
#826305
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hi! i didn't read it all through yet, but I definitely have some tips for you c:

-try not to infodump, especially at the beginning of the story. this can definitely deter readers and makes establishing a clear voice difficult. reveal things the POV character knows over time, or more subtly to make it feel more natural, especially when writing in first person.

-try to write numbers and such out in words, this makes the flow seem much less choppy. when listing things that the character is thinking about try to go train of thought and not do a)this and b) this. It doesn't flow very nicely

-with dialogue, especially when it's going fast-paced, you don't need to tag every line if it is clear who's talking! (ex. "woah," she said) it can slow things down and make the dialogue unrealistic.

that's all I have after kinda skimming the first few pages. You're doing a good job! Creating a consistent writing style just takes time! You'll get there eventually, keep it up <3
Im writing a story (Most likely trash) December 20, 2020 02:37 PM

Former Stable
 
Posts: 0
#826307
Give Award

High Altitude Horses said:
hi! i didn't read it all through yet, but I definitely have some tips for you c:

-try not to infodump, especially at the beginning of the story. this can definitely deter readers and makes establishing a clear voice difficult. reveal things the POV character knows over time, or more subtly to make it feel more natural, especially when writing in first person.

-try to write numbers and such out in words, this makes the flow seem much less choppy. when listing things that the character is thinking about try to go train of thought and not do a)this and b) this. It doesn't flow very nicely

-with dialogue, especially when it's going fast-paced, you don't need to tag every line if it is clear who's talking! (ex. "woah," she said) it can slow things down and make the dialogue unrealistic.

that's all I have after kinda skimming the first few pages. You're doing a good job! Creating a consistent writing style just takes time! You'll get there eventually, keep it up <3


Thank you! I've been going through and deleting all the unnecessary information

Edited at December 20, 2020 02:38 PM by SweetFire Fields

Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
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