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SwankPony
08:00:58 Swanky
Win
love her artwork <3
Phantom Echoes
07:58:37 Win | Mar
Anyways, i'll just keep her as my first W produced :0

Thanks, everyone
Cappuccino
07:55:50 Heyy it's Capp
I use mares like that for testing and color breeding
SwankPony
07:52:05 Swanky
She did go almost au wk4 in dressage, could make a nice SD breeder.
Phantom Echoes
07:45:04 Win | Mar
didnt*
Phantom Echoes
07:44:44 Win | Mar
Yeah, out of her breeding i diвте expect anything to good
DearBorn Ranch
07:44:17 Louise
sorry to tell you but not good
Phantom Echoes
07:43:21 Win | Mar
-HEE Click-
ArcticLights
07:40:58 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Win, its not amazing but not horrible either. Depends on the rest of her training
Phantom Echoes
07:39:25 Win | Mar
Is 333334 for a WEE good? She's a week 11-
ArcticLights
07:35:54 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Pearl is Prlprl or prlprl
ArcticLights
07:35:26 Ceci / (Call me) AL
So Chch/ChCh Zz/ZZ
ArcticLights
07:35:04 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Champagne is Chch or ChCh. Silver is Zz or ZZ
Ravenwood Farm
07:34:21 
Champagne is my weakest spot I'm afraid😓
Darkside Dreams
07:32:47 Grape | X hoarder
What would be the phenotype for a silver champagne? What about a silver champagne with pearl? I know a bit about genetics but not champagne lol
ArcticLights
07:30:58 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Grape, maybe. Depends on the question
Ravenwood Farm
07:29:13 
For colors? I'm not an expert, but know a bit, maybe I can help
Darkside Dreams
07:27:37 Grape | X hoarder
Do we have any genetics folks on at the moment?
ArcticLights
07:19:49 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Have an annoying ear-ache
BlackRose
07:05:49 Stella
Hello how is everyone?

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SwankPony
08:00:58 Swanky
Win
love her artwork <3
Phantom Echoes
07:58:37 Win | Mar
Anyways, i'll just keep her as my first W produced :0

Thanks, everyone
Cappuccino
07:55:50 Heyy it's Capp
I use mares like that for testing and color breeding
SwankPony
07:52:05 Swanky
She did go almost au wk4 in dressage, could make a nice SD breeder.
Phantom Echoes
07:45:04 Win | Mar
didnt*
Phantom Echoes
07:44:44 Win | Mar
Yeah, out of her breeding i diвте expect anything to good
DearBorn Ranch
07:44:17 Louise
sorry to tell you but not good
Phantom Echoes
07:43:21 Win | Mar
-HEE Click-
ArcticLights
07:40:58 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Win, its not amazing but not horrible either. Depends on the rest of her training
Phantom Echoes
07:39:25 Win | Mar
Is 333334 for a WEE good? She's a week 11-
ArcticLights
07:35:54 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Pearl is Prlprl or prlprl
ArcticLights
07:35:26 Ceci / (Call me) AL
So Chch/ChCh Zz/ZZ
ArcticLights
07:35:04 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Champagne is Chch or ChCh. Silver is Zz or ZZ
Ravenwood Farm
07:34:21 
Champagne is my weakest spot I'm afraid😓
Darkside Dreams
07:32:47 Grape | X hoarder
What would be the phenotype for a silver champagne? What about a silver champagne with pearl? I know a bit about genetics but not champagne lol
ArcticLights
07:30:58 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Grape, maybe. Depends on the question
Ravenwood Farm
07:29:13 
For colors? I'm not an expert, but know a bit, maybe I can help
Darkside Dreams
07:27:37 Grape | X hoarder
Do we have any genetics folks on at the moment?
ArcticLights
07:19:49 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Have an annoying ear-ache
BlackRose
07:05:49 Stella
Hello how is everyone?

You must be a registered member for more
than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.






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Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1    2 

I'm Writing a Thing December 17, 2020 04:30 PM


TenaciTea
 
Posts: 1929
#824710
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For those of you who don't know me, hi. I exist. *waves awkwardly*
I wrote a story last summer, submitted it to an anthology, and it got published (I have a link to the google doc containing that short story on my profile page :D)
This year, I wrote something in a free write for AP Literature that I've decided is an idea worth exploring. The free write itself is in my blog somewhere, in case you want to check it out (it's not polished at all)
So I decided- I'm going to write a medium length story about it!
As of this post:
-I haven't exactly settled on the plot. There are a handful of concrete ideas I have picked out, and they have to do with making the story as eerie as possible.
-Characters I am still working on.
-I've got a kind of "prologue" finished, and I would love any thoughts or insight into what I've done so far. Critique is welcome. As are questions.
This is the link to what I've got so far:
(the name is not final and I am open to suggestions)
I'm Writing a Thing December 17, 2020 04:41 PM


Lucky Ranch
 
Posts: 10796
#824713
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O.O I exist too. Omg-
I'm Writing a Thing December 17, 2020 04:53 PM


Savannah Stables
 
Posts: 1471
#824718
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O i exist too
I'm Writing a Thing December 17, 2020 05:43 PM

Former Stable
 
Posts: 0
#824739
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Hey, Tea! Love the title, already has me thinking "What in the world?"
Awesome job!
I'm Writing a Thing December 17, 2020 09:37 PM


TenaciTea
 
Posts: 1929
#824876
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SweetFire Fields said:
Hey, Tea! Love the title, already has me thinking "What in the world?"
Awesome job!


I aspire to inspire confused horror. :D
I'm Writing a Thing December 18, 2020 12:44 PM


Darkside Dreams
 
Posts: 1568
#825237
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Oh my god I LOVE IT.
I don't really have any critiques, you're doing great so far! Honestly for your first draft, get words on paper and worry about grammar and word choice later. Write the story. Write it your way. After that's finished, take a step back and look at it objectively. Get some other people to read it and suggest, read it out loud, and that's when you get the flamethrowers out and burn the thing to pieces before stitching it back together into a final draft.
Tl;dr: write the damn thing and edit it into a real book later.

It looks awesome so far!

I'm Writing a Thing December 18, 2020 12:46 PM


TenaciTea
 
Posts: 1929
#825238
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Sunshine Jumpers said:
Oh my god I LOVE IT.
I don't really have any critiques, you're doing great so far! Honestly for your first draft, get words on paper and worry about grammar and word choice later. Write the story. Write it your way. After that's finished, take a step back and look at it objectively. Get some other people to read it and suggest, read it out loud, and that's when you get the flamethrowers out and burn the thing to pieces before stitching it back together into a final draft.
Tl;dr: write the damn thing and edit it into a real book later.

It looks awesome so far!



Thank you! :D
I'm Writing a Thing December 18, 2020 12:53 PM


Broadway
 
Posts: 738
#825240
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That was amazing! The word choice is perfect and really gets the story across well! You have to let us know when this is finished because it is something I would love to read!
I'm Writing a Thing December 18, 2020 01:01 PM


TenaciTea
 
Posts: 1929
#825241
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Birch Wood Barns said:
That was amazing! The word choice is perfect and really gets the story across well! You have to let us know when this is finished because it is something I would love to read!


Aww thank you!
I'm glad you all seem to like my elevator murder weirdness xD
I'm Writing a Thing December 18, 2020 04:30 PM

Former Stable
 
Posts: 0
#825374
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If the other workers are acting like this is normal and she's surprised maybe make this her first week on the job? Also if there's an elevator but no warning not to take it maybe taking the elevator is a test for people? Also how does the murderer leave if the body slumps right as it opens on the third floor?

Some of your word choices made me have to reread the sentence but it's pretty good. "too-late paramedics" feels particularly clumsy in the sentence.


Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
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