Horse Eden Eventing Game
Horse Eden Eventing Game


Year: 199   Season: Spring   
$: 0
Forecast: Afternoon Storms, then Clearing
Forecast:
Thu 02:27am  
Stables Online:  68 
Chatbox
Cataclysm
02:08:35 Maple Syrup ✨
-HEE Click-
Port Royal Equines
02:07:25 ISO Brave EWW ISH
-HEE Click-
EEE broods for 3k!

-HEE Click-
Selling a few horses. Take a look?
The Fallen Rulers
01:35:42 Storm|RID/SD Lord
plenty of W XC RID mares available! Come take your pick.
Elysium Opalus
12:22:29 free palestine
Auction!
Join in the monthly events and explore with ease with E-WC braves. And boost your show string with G1 EE-WEEs. Rare colors too!
-HEE Click-

Taking lowball brood offers for a new g1 WEE AA mare! Plenty of EE+ and E-WC brave broods here too!
-HEE Click-
PoloStables
12:06:50 MightyMo
-HEE Click- WWW stallion for breeding ONLY 10 covers are available 6-10 have been used. Get them while you still can!
Golden Leaf Stables
11:57:37 
Barn CLEAROUT cheap WWE

-HEE Click-
Silver Tail Farm
11:20:59 Jo (X Acct)
Doing a hard cull on my SD X herd, so I have some nice ones up for sale
-HEE Click-
Asfamoth
11:18:23 Asfa
-HEE Click- Upgrades
Black Meadow Estate
11:15:01 Meadow
-HEE Click-
Smores and Wafers
He is #1 on the ISHLB stud fee 50K
Shamrock Vale
11:13:22 
Anyone selling a 1 month upgrade?

You must be a registered member for more
than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.



Rules   Hide
You are in: Sales
View Main Chat
Quests

Embark on a Quest.

Horse Eden Eventing Game
Chatbox
Cataclysm
02:08:35 Maple Syrup ✨
-HEE Click-
Port Royal Equines
02:07:25 ISO Brave EWW ISH
-HEE Click-
EEE broods for 3k!

-HEE Click-
Selling a few horses. Take a look?
The Fallen Rulers
01:35:42 Storm|RID/SD Lord
plenty of W XC RID mares available! Come take your pick.
Elysium Opalus
12:22:29 free palestine
Auction!
Join in the monthly events and explore with ease with E-WC braves. And boost your show string with G1 EE-WEEs. Rare colors too!
-HEE Click-

Taking lowball brood offers for a new g1 WEE AA mare! Plenty of EE+ and E-WC brave broods here too!
-HEE Click-
PoloStables
12:06:50 MightyMo
-HEE Click- WWW stallion for breeding ONLY 10 covers are available 6-10 have been used. Get them while you still can!
Golden Leaf Stables
11:57:37 
Barn CLEAROUT cheap WWE

-HEE Click-
Silver Tail Farm
11:20:59 Jo (X Acct)
Doing a hard cull on my SD X herd, so I have some nice ones up for sale
-HEE Click-
Asfamoth
11:18:23 Asfa
-HEE Click- Upgrades
Black Meadow Estate
11:15:01 Meadow
-HEE Click-
Smores and Wafers
He is #1 on the ISHLB stud fee 50K
Shamrock Vale
11:13:22 
Anyone selling a 1 month upgrade?

You must be a registered member for more
than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.






Refresh


Forums

→ Horse Eden is a fun game! Sign Up Now!

My Subscriptions
My Bookmarks
My Topics
Latest Topics
Following

Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1    2 

I'm Writing a Thing December 17, 2020 04:30 PM


TenaciTea
 
Posts: 1929
#824710
Give Award
For those of you who don't know me, hi. I exist. *waves awkwardly*
I wrote a story last summer, submitted it to an anthology, and it got published (I have a link to the google doc containing that short story on my profile page :D)
This year, I wrote something in a free write for AP Literature that I've decided is an idea worth exploring. The free write itself is in my blog somewhere, in case you want to check it out (it's not polished at all)
So I decided- I'm going to write a medium length story about it!
As of this post:
-I haven't exactly settled on the plot. There are a handful of concrete ideas I have picked out, and they have to do with making the story as eerie as possible.
-Characters I am still working on.
-I've got a kind of "prologue" finished, and I would love any thoughts or insight into what I've done so far. Critique is welcome. As are questions.
This is the link to what I've got so far:
(the name is not final and I am open to suggestions)
I'm Writing a Thing December 17, 2020 04:41 PM


Lucky Ranch
 
Posts: 10801
#824713
Give Award
O.O I exist too. Omg-
I'm Writing a Thing December 17, 2020 04:53 PM


Savannah Stables
 
Posts: 1471
#824718
Give Award
O i exist too
I'm Writing a Thing December 17, 2020 05:43 PM

Former Stable
 
Posts: 0
#824739
Give Award
Hey, Tea! Love the title, already has me thinking "What in the world?"
Awesome job!
I'm Writing a Thing December 17, 2020 09:37 PM


TenaciTea
 
Posts: 1929
#824876
Give Award

SweetFire Fields said:
Hey, Tea! Love the title, already has me thinking "What in the world?"
Awesome job!


I aspire to inspire confused horror. :D
I'm Writing a Thing December 18, 2020 12:44 PM


Darkside Dreams
 
Posts: 1568
#825237
Give Award
Oh my god I LOVE IT.
I don't really have any critiques, you're doing great so far! Honestly for your first draft, get words on paper and worry about grammar and word choice later. Write the story. Write it your way. After that's finished, take a step back and look at it objectively. Get some other people to read it and suggest, read it out loud, and that's when you get the flamethrowers out and burn the thing to pieces before stitching it back together into a final draft.
Tl;dr: write the damn thing and edit it into a real book later.

It looks awesome so far!

I'm Writing a Thing December 18, 2020 12:46 PM


TenaciTea
 
Posts: 1929
#825238
Give Award

Sunshine Jumpers said:
Oh my god I LOVE IT.
I don't really have any critiques, you're doing great so far! Honestly for your first draft, get words on paper and worry about grammar and word choice later. Write the story. Write it your way. After that's finished, take a step back and look at it objectively. Get some other people to read it and suggest, read it out loud, and that's when you get the flamethrowers out and burn the thing to pieces before stitching it back together into a final draft.
Tl;dr: write the damn thing and edit it into a real book later.

It looks awesome so far!



Thank you! :D
I'm Writing a Thing December 18, 2020 12:53 PM


Broadway
 
Posts: 738
#825240
Give Award
That was amazing! The word choice is perfect and really gets the story across well! You have to let us know when this is finished because it is something I would love to read!
I'm Writing a Thing December 18, 2020 01:01 PM


TenaciTea
 
Posts: 1929
#825241
Give Award

Birch Wood Barns said:
That was amazing! The word choice is perfect and really gets the story across well! You have to let us know when this is finished because it is something I would love to read!


Aww thank you!
I'm glad you all seem to like my elevator murder weirdness xD
I'm Writing a Thing December 18, 2020 04:30 PM

Former Stable
 
Posts: 0
#825374
Give Award

If the other workers are acting like this is normal and she's surprised maybe make this her first week on the job? Also if there's an elevator but no warning not to take it maybe taking the elevator is a test for people? Also how does the murderer leave if the body slumps right as it opens on the third floor?

Some of your word choices made me have to reread the sentence but it's pretty good. "too-late paramedics" feels particularly clumsy in the sentence.


Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1    2 

Refresh