Horse Eden Eventing Game
Horse Eden Eventing Game


Year: 198   Season: Summer   
$: 0
Forecast: Partly Cloudy, Rain Possible
Forecast:
Thu 06:48am  
Stables Online:  69 
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Guard Horseman Gang
06:47:08 GHG
adult image available i cant wait till he grows up
-HEE Click-
Silver Melody Acres
06:47:02 Solar - KNNs
Um, I always seem to miss seeing I caught a brindle XD maybe because they tend to have longer color names anyway lol
-HEE Click-
Silver Melody Acres
06:44:53 Solar - KNNs
Oh, both of them are gorgeous
Tamarack Mountain
06:44:09 Opal
oh he grew up fancy!
-HEE Click-
Guard Horseman Gang
06:37:30 GHG
cuaght this brindle this morning
-HEE Click-
Silver Melody Acres
06:27:53 Solar - KNNs
Nice little lady!
Golden Rose
05:38:22 Rose
This * -_-
Golden Rose
05:38:05 Rose
Thai girl kept standing for photos, I'm like "surly she'll be world class" lol. Well, she is! -HEE Click-
Golden Rose
05:37:25 Rose
Royal
If I remember correctly, you use it in your field where you've planted hay
Buzz Stables
05:32:46 Royal
Guys how do I use my make it rain dance?
Thunderbolt Park
04:48:12 Bolt
-HEE Click-

Omg he's so cute
ArcticLights
04:35:16 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Araluen, nice :)
Araluen
04:01:20 
finally feel like i'm getting somewhere with showing, consistently pulling numbers like todays: 96 horses entered for 62500, 96 horses competed for 119025 :D
ArcticLights
03:37:36 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Oak, he's cute
Oakmoss Stud
03:33:26 Oak
-HEE Click- random quest baby turned out cute + decently rated?
Maco Stables
03:10:28 Maco
Thanks for the info!
Thornwood Manor
03:09:40 
It's when you quit something suddenly
Maco Stables
03:07:13 Maco
(catching up on the main chat while wondering what is a cold turkey)
Motonemi
02:32:01 AL, mum to Nemi
Ah I see, need to dig up a different name then
Westeros Livery
02:29:23 Khaleesi
ae also makes a different sound than just e, think eris, -Click-

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Guard Horseman Gang
06:47:08 GHG
adult image available i cant wait till he grows up
-HEE Click-
Silver Melody Acres
06:47:02 Solar - KNNs
Um, I always seem to miss seeing I caught a brindle XD maybe because they tend to have longer color names anyway lol
-HEE Click-
Silver Melody Acres
06:44:53 Solar - KNNs
Oh, both of them are gorgeous
Tamarack Mountain
06:44:09 Opal
oh he grew up fancy!
-HEE Click-
Guard Horseman Gang
06:37:30 GHG
cuaght this brindle this morning
-HEE Click-
Silver Melody Acres
06:27:53 Solar - KNNs
Nice little lady!
Golden Rose
05:38:22 Rose
This * -_-
Golden Rose
05:38:05 Rose
Thai girl kept standing for photos, I'm like "surly she'll be world class" lol. Well, she is! -HEE Click-
Golden Rose
05:37:25 Rose
Royal
If I remember correctly, you use it in your field where you've planted hay
Buzz Stables
05:32:46 Royal
Guys how do I use my make it rain dance?
Thunderbolt Park
04:48:12 Bolt
-HEE Click-

Omg he's so cute
ArcticLights
04:35:16 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Araluen, nice :)
Araluen
04:01:20 
finally feel like i'm getting somewhere with showing, consistently pulling numbers like todays: 96 horses entered for 62500, 96 horses competed for 119025 :D
ArcticLights
03:37:36 Ceci / (Call me) AL
Oak, he's cute
Oakmoss Stud
03:33:26 Oak
-HEE Click- random quest baby turned out cute + decently rated?
Maco Stables
03:10:28 Maco
Thanks for the info!
Thornwood Manor
03:09:40 
It's when you quit something suddenly
Maco Stables
03:07:13 Maco
(catching up on the main chat while wondering what is a cold turkey)
Motonemi
02:32:01 AL, mum to Nemi
Ah I see, need to dig up a different name then
Westeros Livery
02:29:23 Khaleesi
ae also makes a different sound than just e, think eris, -Click-

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than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.






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Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1    2 

I'm Writing a Thing December 18, 2020 04:39 PM


TenaciTea
 
Posts: 1929
#825382
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Pandora Creek said:

If the other workers are acting like this is normal and she's surprised maybe make this her first week on the job? Also if there's an elevator but no warning not to take it maybe taking the elevator is a test for people? Also how does the murderer leave if the body slumps right as it opens on the third floor?

Some of your word choices made me have to reread the sentence but it's pretty good. "too-late paramedics" feels particularly clumsy in the sentence.



The idea is that she's kind of isolated from what's going on (doesn't really pay much attention to the news, etc) and the behavior that's been spreading has been kind of normalized violence, justified by "laziness". She's not aware of it. I haven't figured out much of her backstory yet, but the fact that using elevators is generally frowned on (and in her place of work, responsible resource use is especially important) might contribute to why she hasn't witnessed this before.
And I never said which floor the elevator started from xD
Yep! This is only a first draft, I'll look into changing that sentence.

Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1    2 

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