But then my brother came back because he again could only be cut up into pieces and he hugged me in my bunny suit and we went back to earth again with had been overrun by zombie dogs

And there we were both cut into tiny pieces...

And then for some reason I stayed alive even though my brother died but I woke up 1,000,000,000 years later and people were everywhere but they all had wings and fur so I screamed.

"Wh-where am I" I asked a guy who was so hot and we knew we liked each other instantly

The guy looked at me weird, taking off his sunglasses, though he didn't seem disgusted or irritated. "Lorenzo City, why do you ask? And what are you dressed in?" He asked. You looked down to see you were still wearing the bunny suit. +Crap+ "I was in a play" you responded

Then you ran off to go die in a hole

Embarrassed, you wished you could die, but you didn't even die after being chopped up so you couldn't die yet sadly. You found that there was hundreds upon thousands of dollars in the pockets of your suit, so you went and bought some better clothing and changed into that.

then you realized you had forgotten the money and when you got back the hot guy was eating it

Oh umm tgat was my money and what's your name I asked batting my eyes

+why da rattlesnakes Is he eating money+ u thought, confused, but you didn't let it show and instead twirled your hair around your hand. The guy smiled at you rather creepily. "I just like eating money. It tastes like germanos. My name is Gluten."