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After some feedback and rereading a couple excerpts from the books on my shelves, I'm going with third person. Some descriptions got super jumbled so it felt like the best option. Would anyone want to read the first few chapters? Would love some feedback on the start to know it's going in the right direction :) |
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Caaldir Equestrian said:
After some feedback and rereading a couple excerpts from the books on my shelves, I'm going with third person. Some descriptions got super jumbled so it felt like the best option. Would anyone want to read the first few chapters? Would love some feedback on the start to know it's going in the right direction :)
Me me me me! |
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Caaldir Equestrian said:
After some feedback and rereading a couple excerpts from the books on my shelves, I'm going with third person. Some descriptions got super jumbled so it felt like the best option. Would anyone want to read the first few chapters? Would love some feedback on the start to know it's going in the right direction :)
Me me me me! |
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Trivia Team
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Caaldir Equestrian said:
After some feedback and rereading a couple excerpts from the books on my shelves, I'm going with third person. Some descriptions got super jumbled so it felt like the best option. Would anyone want to read the first few chapters? Would love some feedback on the start to know it's going in the right direction :)
I'd love to! |
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I revised some on the document and only decided to add this little bit, it felt like the best. I really feel I should lengthen a lot of this because it feels too short, but I also tend to do a lot of description to make up for it so I don't want it to drone on haha. The second part isn't finished, it's just what I had written down so far and I'm really struggling with it. Also some dialouge help would be amazing! |
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Caal, I love it so far! And I would love to help you write some dialogue when or if needed! You can just give me a basis of the character and the interaction and I'd be glad to help! Also, for the first draft this is really great! I do recommend not revising though. I do it all the time (perfectionist lol) and it let's me never get it done. So, if you want to change somthing, since your in docs, add a comment to it, or highlight it or something so you know. And if you have the motivation to write a scene butdnt know how to get to it, skip! Don't loose that writing motivation! Put something like, (Epic battle scene) and continue writing! (Also, you can clean up in the second draft) Hope some of these help! I love the story so far! |
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Oakwood Barn said:
Caal, I love it so far! And I would love to help you write some dialogue when or if needed! You can just give me a basis of the character and the interaction and I'd be glad to help! Also, for the first draft this is really great! I do recommend not revising though. I do it all the time (perfectionist lol) and it let's me never get it done. So, if you want to change somthing, since your in docs, add a comment to it, or highlight it or something so you know. And if you have the motivation to write a scene butdnt know how to get to it, skip! Don't loose that writing motivation! Put something like, (Epic battle scene) and continue writing! (Also, you can clean up in the second draft) Hope some of these help! I love the story so far!
Thank you! I'll defintely take you up on that at some point haha |
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Okay a little update. I'm starting Chapter Three! Starting is a really loose term, at the moment what is updated is just stupid ideas I've strung together. My current problem is it feels like it should be longer? Any ideas on how stretch it out and add in some length? How should I have them interact? It feels like I've got the idea, I just can't put them together in the right way. ***
Currently it feels like it's moving too fast, and I really want it to take time so I can show the kind of devastation and pain that comes with an event like that. I thought about drawing out her little fight, the detail on the walk through the outpost, etc, but I'm not sure with what. Today my writing feels drab, almost childlike and not anything like the authors I've been reading. Yes, it's loose like theirs, more like retelling a story, but it isn't quite flowing. It's rigid and I'm not sure how to break it up. |
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Moderate Temperatures and Overcast
